He Who Talks to Angels
by Veronica Cereta
Summary: Asuka and Shinji are ordered to do volunteer work with some remarkable children. Turns out that there's more to one child than anyone expected.
1. Default Chapter

A/N: This fic takes place sometime after episode 15. I don't mean to offend anyone. Some of   
the language may be derogatory, but it is used to make a point. Emi and Natsumi belong to me,   
no one else does, and I'm not making money off this. Enjoy!  
  
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He Who Talks to Angels  
By Veronica Cereta  
  
*************************************************************************  
  
Misato looked across the table at the two pilots. Shinji was sitting strait up; hands folded in his   
lap. Asuka was taking a more casual stance, slumped down in the wooden chair, her arm slung   
over the back.  
  
"This was all Ritsuko's idea, so don't blame me." Misato found herself already apologizing.  
  
"Well . . . we can't really get mad at you until you tell us what the idea is," Shinji replied.  
  
"Oh, yeah. She thinks that you guys are having trouble deciding why you're fighting. You lack   
focus."  
  
"What! That's crazy!" The red head interjected.  
  
"Quiet, Asuka. It's not so bad. She just wants you to do some volunteer work in the community.   
You know, get to know the people you are fighting for."  
  
"Humph," the red head turned away. "I see wonder girl isn't here. Does she know about this?"  
  
"Rei is totally focused. It was decided that she will not participate in this . . . activity. She   
knows why she fights; it's for humanity; she understands."  
  
"I fight to save humanity, too!" The second children whined.  
  
"Don't give me that crap! You fight because you want everyone to know what a talented person   
you are. You said so yourself."  
  
The dark haired boy broke the argument. "Where exactly are we to be doing this volunteer   
work?"  
  
"Oh, it's a really cool place. I have a friend who works in a group home with three disabled   
people. When I mentioned the idea to her she explained that two of the kids could really benefit   
from mentors. I think you two will do just fine."  
  
"What! This sucks! I don't want to waste my time with a bunch of retards!"  
  
"Asuka, that is uncalled for! If you talk like that tomorrow. . ."  
  
"Tomorrow! You mean we have to go then, that's so soon."  
  
"Yes, you have to go then. Ritsuko thought that the sooner you go the better. You'll be   
spending a couple hours there twice a week."  
  
"I don't believe this!" The fiery haired girl stormed to her room."  
  
Misato looked at the boy across from her. "You're okay with this, ne?"  
  
Shinji sighed. "What choice do I have," he muttered as he slowly walked away.  
  
"Well, that went well." The colonel got a beer from the fridge and closed the door to her room.   
Once inside, she picked up her phone and dialed.  
  
"Hello," Ritsuko answered.  
  
"Hi. I told them."  
  
"How did it go?" The blonde already knew the answer.  
  
"Not well. Asuka is totally against it, and Shinji isn't thrilled either. May I ask a question?"  
  
"Of course."  
  
"Why now, and why did you insist on the group home? You practically ordered that I pair one   
of them with the little boy with autism. Is there something special about him?"  
  
"Not really; we just think that contact with someone who has some real problems might get those   
two to quit feeling sorry for themselves for a change. I know a thing or two about autism.   
Whoever works with him will learn a lot about persistence, and that is something that both Shinji   
and Asuka can benefit from. Plus we want them to know what they're fighting for."  
  
"Wait a minute, 'we'? I thought this was your plan."   
  
"Actually, it was mostly Commander Ikari's idea."  
  
"Commander Ikari. Ritsuko, there is something you're not telling me. I hate it when you do   
this."  
  
"I don't know what you're talking about. By the way, who did you decide to pair with the   
autistic boy?"  
  
"Asuka; I think she needs it the most."  
  
"I see. Well, have a nice night, Misato."  
  
"You, too, Ritsuko." The colonel knew her friend was hiding something. 'What could be so   
important about such a little boy, so important that Commander Ikari would take notice?'  
  
*****************************************************************************  
  
"I don't believe this!" The red head stormed into Shinji's room later that evening, looking for   
someone to hear her complain.  
  
"You've been saying that all night, Asuka." The third children was sitting on his bed. He had   
been listening to his headphones, which he removed as he spoke.  
  
"Well, it's true. How can she say that we don't know what we're fighting for? I know why I   
fight."  
  
"It's probably not you as much as it is me," the boy sighed. "They probably just included you so   
I wouldn't feel singled out."  
  
Asuka thought for a moment. It made sense. "Hey, I bet your right! Thanks, Shinji! You're not   
as dumb as you look. That's why I was included in this dumb activity, so you wouldn't feel   
bad."  
  
Shinji knew that it was a lie. If the only reason Asuka had been involved was to make him feel   
better, then Rei would have been included as well. No, there was a reason that he and Asuka   
were the ones participating, and a reason Rei had been left out. However, the second children   
looked ten times happier, now that she didn't feel punished or in need of correction. It was   
worth a little lie to see her smiling, and to get her to stop complaining.  
  
Asuka got up to leave. "Well, see you in the morning." She hovered by the door as if trying to   
say something, or waiting for something to be said.  
  
"See you," Shinji replied as she turned and slowly walked out of the room.  
  
**************************************************************************  
  
School passed uneventfully. At lunch Shinji explained his plans for the afternoon with his   
friends. "Yeah, they seem to think it will be good for us."  
  
"That's terrible!" Toji remarked, "They've got you doing extra work and I suppose you don't   
even get paid more?"  
  
"Well, it's not like we get a regular salary as it is."  
  
"Yeah," Kensuke broke in, "and if Misato thinks it's a good idea, it can't be that bad."  
  
"Actually," Shinji remarked, "she didn't really say what she thought of it, just that we had to do   
it because Ritsuko said so."  
  
Toji shook his head, "Unbelievable."   
  
"Well." Kensuke was thoughtful. "You said the person working there was a friend of Misato's. I   
bet she's a babe, too. Maybe you could introduce us."  
  
"I don't know."  
  
"Ah, come on, Shinji!" Toji complained.  
  
"Okay, if she's cute, I'll see what I can do." Shinji smiled at his friends then became lost in his   
thoughts while the two other boys ooggled about his guardian.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
"Isn't it just awful?" Asuka had been griping to her best friend.  
  
"I really don't think it's all that bad," Hikari commented, angering her friend even more.  
  
"What! It's just a waste of time! I have more important things to do."  
  
"I guess." The girl was staring longingly at a boy who was sitting with Shinji. Asuka could see   
she was not going to get much sympathy out of her lovelorn friend. She smiled inwardly and   
watched Hikari watch Toji.  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
Misato picked the two children up from school. She didn't want them trying to stall and arrive   
late for their first day. "Now pay attention, because this is the way you will be walking."  
  
"Hai." Shinji made a mental map of the drive.  
  
Misato had more instructions. "After your time each day is completed you will each fill out   
detailed reports. These reports will be sent to Commander Ikari. They should explain exactly   
what you did, what your assigned child did, and what you learned. It is important that these   
reports be submitted the next time that you report for duty. Don't put off doing them."  
  
"This is dumb," Asuka interrupted. "It's like we're in grammar school, writing essays on what   
we have learned."  
  
"These aren't essays," Misato replied, "They are official reports, and they are very important."   
'Though I have no idea why,' she added silently.  
  
The group pulled into the driveway of a white wooden house. It looked a bit odd set against the   
apartment high rises of Tokyo Three. However, there were several houses built by people who   
loved the quaint look and could afford that much space. This house had been donated by a very   
wealthy patron. "Here we are," Misato smiled. They got out and walked slowly to the door.   
Asuka arrived first and rang the doorbell.  
  
A middle-aged man with sandy blonde hair and small beady black eyes opened the door. He   
looked down at Asuka. "I like you. Your pretty."  
  
The red head screamed, "Get away from me you pervert!" The man looked dumbfounded.  
  
"Don't mind her, Aibu," Misato apologised, shooting the second children a nastey look. "She   
doesn't take complements well."  
  
"Hi, Misato!" Abiu's smile took up most of his face. "You look pretty as usual."  
  
"Domo Arigato. May we come in?"  
  
"Sure, sure." The man stepped back from the door allowing the three to walk by.   
  
In the kitchen they found a woman with thin blonde hair writing in a large binder. It appeared to   
Shinji that he wouldn't have to worry about introducing anyone to his companions if this was   
Misato's friend.   
  
Misato spoke, "Hello. Is Kathryn working today?"  
  
"No," the woman was quick with her reply.  
  
"Well, would you please tell her I stopped by."  
  
"And you are?"  
  
"Kasuragi Misato."  
  
"Alright. May, I ask what you are doing here? If you came by to talk to your friend you should   
know that staff aren't allowed to have guests while they're working."  
  
"No, these guys are going to be mentoring Emi and Natsumi." Misato nodded at Shinji and   
Asuka.  
  
"Fine, the children are outside." She motioned to the sliding door that led to the back yard.  
  
"Arigato." One of the things Shinji admired about his guardian was her ability to be very polite   
to rude people.   
  
The three went outside. In the yard there was a swing set and a trampoline. A little girl in a pink   
dress and a white helmet was swinging, while a boy stood in a corner looking at the trees.   
Misato called, "Emi, Natsumi, would you please come here?" Asuka hoped she wouldn't get the   
one with the helmet. She looked a little odd.  
  
The girl got off the swing and ran over. The three waited for the boy When it was evident he   
wasn't moving, Misato went over, took him by the hand and led him to the other children.   
"Well," she turned to the pilots, "these are the children you will be working with. Shinji, this is   
Natsumi." The red head breathed a sigh of relief as her roommate was introduced to the girl with   
the helmet.   
  
Shinji held out a hand which the young girl shook, grinning broadly. "Hi, I'm five!" She   
exclaimed.  
  
"Wow," Shinji replied for lack of a better response.  
  
Misato smiled in approval, then turned. "Asuka, I would like you to meet Emi."  
  
Following the third children's example the red head extended a hand to the little boy. He looked   
at it and ran back to his position on the lawn. Asuka looked at her guardian questioningly.  
  
"Oh, Emi can't talk. He has autism."  
  
"No fair!" yelled the pilot. "Shinji's can talk. I want one that can talk!"   
  
"Enough, Asuka," Misato said angrily. "Emi probably wants a mentor who isn't so selfish, and   
can control her temper." Shinji looked up at the colonel; she continued, paying no attention to the   
boy. "It looks like neither of you are getting what you want."  
  
Asuka wondered why she was being so hard on her. 'She must have deep feelings about this   
place, about that boy.' "Fine!" replied the second children.  
  
"Great!" Misato looked happy again. "I'll be going now. Think you two can find your way   
home?"  
  
"Hai," Shinji replied quietly.  
  
"Okay, see you at home!" With that Misato spun around and walked away leaving the slightly   
confused pilots.  
  
"Now what!" Asuka looked to Shinji.  
  
"I guess, we get to work."  
  
"Work!"  
  
The dark haired boy was already bending down to be eye level with the little girl, "What would   
you like to do?"  
  
"I like to swing!"  
  
The two took off towards the swing set. Asuka stared at her assigned child. He was just looking   
at the trees, not really doing much of anything. What was *she* supposed to do with him? She   
walked over and watched the trees for a moment. The sunlight was filtering through them,   
making bright dancing splotches on the grass in front of her. The boy had his hand out and was   
watching it play with the light. Sighing, the second children extended a hand. She blocked some   
rays, and allowed others to slip through her fingers. When she turned and noticed that Shinji was   
staring at her she quickly dropped her hand, sat down and prepared to wait out the two hours.  
  
Shinji wondered why she had stopped. She had seemed so innocent, so childlike reaching out for   
the sun. It was a side of her that he rarely saw, but one that he thoroughly enjoyed. He went   
back to pushing Natsumi on the swing. As he pushed the young girl excitedly told him all about   
dinosaurs, her favorite topic. He nodded and feigned interest; however, the pilot was used to his   
monsters being a bit more contemporary. Still he was impressed with her knowledge on the   
subject as she explained to him which dinosaurs lived in the Jurassic and which were Cretaceous.   
She knew which ones ate meat and which ones were herbivores. He soon found that while he   
wasn't relishing this natural history lesson, he did enjoy the enthusiasm of his teacher. Suddenly   
the girl turned the conversation. She wanted to know about his life. He told her about living   
with Misato and Asuka. He talked about his school and a little about the difficulty of his job.   
She was simply amazed by every aspect of his life. She listened intently and added 'wow's and   
'cool's from time to time. Every now and then she would star off into space in the middle of the   
conversation, at first he thought he was boring, but then realized that there was no way to rouse   
her from these spells. If he waited them out she soon returned to her perky, talkative self. He   
had to admit, this wasn't a terrible to spend an afternoon. As the boy looked up, he saw his   
roommate going into the house.  
  
Asuka was grateful. Finally Emi was going to do something. He had left his position on the   
yard and went to what the girl assumed was his room. The bed was unmade; clothes, books and   
toys were spread across the floor. The books were mainly Disney related, and there were plenty   
of model horses. The walls were lined with Disney posters and pictures of horses. "Oh, you like   
horses?" The question was more for her benefit; she didn't expect an answer. The boy sat down   
in the middle of the room, picked up a yellow bucket, and threw five, large, multi colored blocks   
into it. Then he began to spin the blocks inside the pail. He seemed delighted as they spun   
around making a gentle whooshing sound. 'Great!' Asuka thought. 'I wonder how long he will   
keep this up.' The pilot picked up a few horses and looked at them, trying to identify the breeds   
she knew.  
  
As soon as the two hours were up she bolted for the door. "Shinji!" she called. "We're   
leaving!" The third children came quickly. They left without saying goodbye to anyone.  
  
On the way home Shinji was talkative. "You wouldn't believe all that Natsumi knows about   
dinosaurs. She's a very bright child. Do you want to know what she said when I left? She said,   
'I can't wait to for you to come over again.' It was actually kind of fun."  
  
"Just shut up!" Asuka snapped. After a long pause she added, quieter, "It's not fair. You always   
have all the luck."  
  
The two walked in silence the rest of the way home. At the house Misato was waiting. "How   
was it?"  
  
Shinji smiled, "It wasn't bad."  
  
"It sucked," screeched Asuka going to her room and slamming the door.  
  
Shinji looked at his guardian. "She didn't have a very good day."  
  
"I can see." She frowned. "Well, tell me about your day."  
  
Shinji explained all about Natsumi, even recalling a few facts she had taught him about   
dinosaurs. "She seems so intelligent. What's wrong with her."  
  
"Well, you noticed the helmet. Did you also notice how sometimes she just didn't seem to be   
there? You guys would be talking and all the sudden it was like her mind was elsewhere."  
  
"Uh huh."  
  
"A year ago Natsumi was in a car accident. She got hit in the head pretty hard. She has a   
Traumatic Brain Injury, or TBI. Because of the damage to her brain, she has seizures.   
Sometimes she falls down and can't control her movements. That's what the helmet is for.   
These are called grand mal seizures. They're pretty rare with her, since her medication controls   
them quite well. Other times she just stares off into space. These are petit mal seizures. They   
are more frequent and less serious. Still, if she continues to have them, she will never drive a   
car, or hold a very competitive job."  
  
"I see." Shinji left for his room.   
  
*****************************************************************************  
  
The next day at the office Commander Ikari fingered Asuka's report.  
  
"So the autistic child still isn't talking?" Fuyutsuki watched the Commander.  
  
"No, Emi didn't say anything to the second children."  
  
"Then there's still time."  
  
"Presumably so."  
  
"What I don't understand," the gray haired man continued, "is why you have the pilots do it.   
Why not just place the kid under surveillance."  
  
"If we did that, people would get suspicious. The government would get involved and everyone   
would want to know what we know about him. This way, no one notices. Nobody cares if two   
kids do volunteer work at a group home. It's a cover, of course."  
  
"I see. Aren't you going to read Shinji's report?"  
  
"It's irrelevant."  
  
"Still, you're making him write it, and it shows some real understanding."  
  
"He writes it so that no one thinks we are singling out Emi or Asuka. There is no need to look at   
it."  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
Two days later the two pilots were back at the group home.   
  
"Hi, Aibu," said the dark haired boy. Asuka simply walked past.  
  
Natsumi ran up and hugged Shinji, almost knocking him down. Asuka had to smile, 'what a   
good father he'll make someday.' She trudged up the stairs to Emi's room. He was there,   
spinning blocks. The girl sat down next to him. She watched for a long while. Eventually the   
bucket was placed on the floor between to two. Asuka grabbed it and started to spin. It was   
harder than it looked. She couldn't get the blocks to move uniformly, and rather than a   
whooshing noise there was a harsh clunking sound. The red head handed the bucket back to the   
little boy. He spun the blocks effortlessly and beautifully, then allowed her to try again. As she   
worked on her block spinning technique, she happened to glance over at the boy. He was   
smiling at her. She smiled herself. "Now we're getting somewhere," she beamed at the child.   
He made shrieking noises and ran down the stairs to get away from her. As Asuka watched him   
go, something inside snapped. Her pride finally kicked in. She decided that she would become   
good at this. If Shinji could get along with his assigned child, she could connect with hers. They   
all would see what a good mentor she was, and then they would know that she really could do   
anything. She wouldn't fail. Sohryu Asuka Langly got up and went downstairs to look for the   
boy.  
  
She found the boy in the back yard jumping on the trampoline. The pilot took off her shoes and   
hoisted herself up onto the trampoline. As the two jumped they looked at each other and   
laughed. Emi stood in front of Asuka held his hands up for her to grab them. She took the   
outstretched arms and they jumped higher, giggling and smiling.  
  
Shinji looked over at his roommate. He and Natsumi had set up a table in a corner of the yard   
and were playing checkers. Low tree branches that made it difficult for anyone to see inside   
surrounded them. The little girl had called this her thinking spot. The third children watched the   
second jump. She looked really good in those cut off shorts and yellow spaghetti strap shirt. Her   
eyes sparkled and she never stopped smiling as she jumped with the little boy. Soon the time to   
leave arrived. Shinji said goodbye to the girl who had just captured his last checker.   
  
He went to the trampoline and offered a hand to Asuka. She jumped down refusing his hand, but   
smiling at him none the less. He waited patiently as she put on her shoes, and waved goodbye to   
a boy who didn't even acknowledge that she was leaving. It was okay though; she was getting   
much better at this mentoring thing.  
  
Asuka talked much of the way home. She told Shinji about how connected she had felt when   
Emi had looked at her and smiled. "It's funny. People look at me all the time, (I mean I am   
incredibly attractive) but I never feel a connection with them. When Emi did it; though, it was   
wonderful. Maybe that's because it is so hard for him to open up to other human beings."  
  
"That's probably it," said Shinji, looking deeply at Asuka.  
  
She blushed very slightly. An intent look from Ikari was just as remarkable as a look from Emi.   
The two had a lot in common.  
  
"How was your day?" she asked and actually listened intently as the first children told her all the   
intelligent, cute things Natsumi had done. Maybe this activity wasn't as bad as she had been   
making it out to be. It certainly wasn't necessary, but it was turning out to be challenging and   
fun.  
  
When they arrived at home the two settled on the couch to watch TV. Asuka wasn't paying   
much attention. She turned to Shinji, "What do you think it's like not to be able to   
communicate? Do you think Emi knows what he has to say, but just can't?"  
  
"Probably."  
  
"That must be horrible. I'm glad my mind is intact and functioning. I don't know what I would   
do if anything ever went wrong up there." She pointed to her head.  
  
"I don't think you really have to worry," he wondered what had brought on this sudden   
contemplative attitude. 'Why would anything bad ever happen to Asuka's mind? Why was she   
so concerned?' Then he thought of Natsumi and three words flashed through his mind.   
Traumatic Brain Injury; it certainly could be a threat in their line of work. Still, nothing terrible   
had happened yet. 'Why worry now.'  
  
The red head stood up to go to her room. It always took her twice as long to do her homework,   
because she had trouble translating the kanji. Her college in Germany hadn't required her to do   
such things. She figured she had better get an early start on that night's mathematics assignment.   
However, she stood for a second, staring at her roommate.  
  
Shinji was getting very sick of her lingering. It seemed every time she left him, she waited. She   
probably wanted him to do or say something but he had no idea what. He just wasn't good at   
this type of thing. "Good night, Asuka," he said poorly.  
  
She smiled, "Good night, Shinji."   
  
******************************************************************************  
  
The angel appeared early the next morning. It came from nowhere, as if it just materialized.   
Because of this there wasn't time to evacuate the citizens, and evacuation during the attack   
would be too risky.  
  
The three children stood in their plug suits awaiting instructions.   
  
"This should be fairly standard." Colonel Kasuragi was confident. "Shinji and Asuka will take   
the offensive."  
  
"Hai!" responded the two children.  
  
"Rei, you will back them up."  
  
"Hai," Rei said quietly.  
  
The pilots entered their entry plugs and began the preparation for launch.  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
Commander Ikari and Fuyutsuki watched from above the control room as the angel terrorized   
Tokyo Three. The monster was roughly humanoid, except much larger, more triangular, and   
completely blue. There was a large red circle in the top of its head. It didn't attack like other   
angels. In the past the monsters had been systematic in their pursuit to destroy Nerv   
Headquarters or some other integral piece of the corporation. This attack was wanton   
destruction, like a very powerful child throwing a temper tantrum.  
  
"It's a bit early to be *his* angel," Fuyutsuki reasoned.  
  
"Not necessarily."  
  
"But the second children's reports confirm that Emi hasn't spoken yet, at least not in her   
presence."  
  
"There is more that one way to control an angel."  
  
"That's skin a cat," the gray haired man muttered under his breath.  
  
If the commander heard the comment, he didn't let on.  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
When everyone was into position Misato looked up at the commander. He nodded almost   
imperceptibly. "Launch!" She yelled as the Evas were propelled to the surface.  
  
Asuka spotted the angel first. Without waiting for her partner she ran up to grab hold of it. As   
Unit 03 reached out for it, the angel turned transparent. The huge metallic arms went right   
through their target.  
  
Ritsuko looked on in disbelief. "That's impossible! It can't do that!"  
  
Asuka looked down at her Eva's empty hands. As soon as the angel was clear of the mecha he   
became solid again and resumed his assault of Tokyo Three. Shinji took the opportunity and   
fired a volley. As the beams approached the angel, he went again went transparent. The shots   
went harmlessly through the beast.   
  
The Evas were not accomplishing anything. Misato got on the communication link. "Everyone,   
form an equilateral triangle encompassing the target. Shinji, take the head, directly in front of   
the angel. Rei and Asuka, take positions behind it." The three deftly moved their Eva's into the   
positions the colonel had specified.   
  
"We are going to confuse that angel. Shinji, fire first. Rei, fire one second after Shinji. Asuka,   
fire half a second after Rei."  
  
"Hai!" The pilots did as they were told, and the angel easily avoided the attack by becoming   
transparent.   
  
"Again!" yelled Misato. "Rei, start."  
  
Unit 00 fired, followed by Unit 03 and then Unit 02. Again the transparent angel avoided the   
attack.  
  
In the control room, Fuyutsuki looked down at the commander. "He certainly gave his angel   
some new techniques."  
  
Gendo merely crossed his fingers in front of his mouth.  
  
"Again! Asuka, start!" Once more the pilots fired and once more the angel avoided all the shots.  
  
"This isn't working!" Ritsuko yelled.  
  
Misato needed time to plan. "When the angel is transparent, he can't do any damage," she   
explained to the children. "You've got to keep it transparent. Make contact with it as much as   
possible."   
  
The children and angel continued their deadly game of tag for almost an hour. They managed to   
keep the citizen fatalities to a minimum. Around noon as the angel was going transparent   
because of a shot from Unit 03, it became fainter and fainter until it just disappeared. The   
Evangelion looked around quickly. When they failed to find the target, they were ordered back   
to headquarters.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Misato went out that evening, and Asuka had a pretty good idea with whom. Her and Shinji   
ordered had ordered a pizza and ate it in the disordered kitchen.   
  
"How's Natsumi?" the second children asked.  
  
Shinji replied with a fatherly smile and a nod. "She's doing great."  
  
Asuka really loved how her roommate talked about his assigned child. She was beginning to feel   
the same affection towards Emi. There was a pause. "That battle this morning sucked!"  
  
Shinji nodded again. "Do you think it will be back?"  
  
"The Angel?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"I really hope not. I have no idea how we will ever beat the damn thing."  
  
"Yeah." 'This is nice,' thought Shinji. They were talking like two friends having a normal   
conversation; well, normal for Nerv personal. "How did you do on the math homework?" he   
continued  
  
"Not so good."  
  
"Really?" Usually his roommate was astounding at mathematics.  
  
"Yeah, the story problems are difficult for me to read."  
  
"Oh, well . . . I can help you with tonight's homework."  
  
"Okay." The red head left to get her book. "I just need to read them for someone and see if I   
have it right," she called from her room.  
  
"Fine."  
  
Back in the kitchen they went over the problems. Shinji was a gentle, understanding tutor,   
always taking time to explain where she went wrong in her translation. He was very impressed   
with her improvement. Sometimes the kanji were difficult for him, and he had lived in Japan all   
of his life.   
  
"Arigato, Shinji," she smiled as she returned to her room to work out the problems.   
  
"You're welcome." Shinji happily put away the dishes, and went off to do his homework.  
  
An hour later Asuka had finished and was very bored. 'No, not bored, lonely,' she decided.   
Eventually she found herself outside the third children's door.   
  
"Come in." Shinji was on his bed, still doing homework.  
  
Asuka searched desperately for something to talk about, a reason she had come. "Are you   
bored?" she asked weakly.   
  
"Umm. . . not really."  
  
"Okay." She stood at his doorway for a moment. "Hey, I know what we could do!"  
  
"Nani?" Shinji asked hesitantly.  
  
"We could give that kiss another try!"  
  
As shocked as the first children was by this request, his next words shocked him even more.   
"You said you would never kiss to kill time again." 'Baka, baka, baka!' he chided himself.  
  
"Maybe this time, it isn't about being bored, maybe. . ." She trailed off. "Oh forget it!" The red   
head stormed out of the room.   
  
"Asuka, wait!" Shinji got up to follow. "What did I do? Asuka!"   
  
It was too late. She had already slammed her door and turned up her music excessively loud. He   
couldn't be heard over the din. Why was he such a jerk? Why didn't he just kiss her? That was   
probably what she had wanted all along, and it was certainly what he wanted. He returned to his   
room hating himself.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
The next morning the angel was back. Again it was without the warning necessary to evacuate   
the citizens. The Nerv staff had gathered in the control room while the children got into their   
suits.   
  
Ritsuko made the obvious observation. "This angel seems to choose morning to attack."  
  
From the center of the room came a faint song. "Just call me angel of the morning, Angel"  
  
The blonde scientist glared at her friend.  
  
"Sorry, just whistling in the dark." Misato apologized as she went to brief the children. From   
down the hall she heard the argument.  
  
"You never do anything! It must suck to be so scared of everything!"  
  
"Well at least I don't expect people to read my mind! How am I supposed to know what you   
want all the time?"  
  
"Any human being . . ." Asuka trailed off as the colonel entered the room.  
  
"What is going on here?"   
  
Rei supplied the answer. "It would appear that the second and third children are having a fight."  
  
Shinji looked at the floor. Asuka stared defiantly at the ceiling.  
  
"Well, put it behind you. We have work to do. We are going to determine how long the angel   
can maintain its transparent state. Shinji, Asuka you will hold a net between your two   
Evangelions. Keep this netting or your Evas in contact with the angel at all times. Rei will back   
you up." She looked pointedly at the two. "Can you work as a team or do I have to substitute in   
Rei for one of you?"  
  
"We can do it," Shinji replied.  
  
"Yeah," said Asuka, determined.  
  
"Okay, then get to your Eva's!"  
  
In a few moments everything was prepared for the battle.  
  
"Launch!" shouted Misato.  
  
The three Eva's rose to the surface. There they saw the angel tearing up Tokyo Three. Shinji   
and Asuka put the angel between themselves. Unit 02 threw the net that had been supplied. It   
slipped away from Unit 01.  
  
"Nice catch, Loser!" Asuka yelled.  
  
"Well, if you could throw. . ." came the muttered reply as Unit 01 stooped to retrieve the net.   
  
The angel was caught between the Eva's. It tried to run, but they kept up with it, heading it off at   
every turn. Rei watched as it got visibly distressed. She prepared to fire if there was trouble.   
With a cry the angel faded from view. This time it reappeared, right behind Rei's Eva. The   
beast grabbed Unit 00 by the neck. The two other Eva's dropped the net. Shinji arrived first and   
was pushed away by the angel. Unit 00 seemed to be fighting for air.   
  
Asuka fired a volley. "Take that, you bastard!"  
  
The angel went transparent, dropping Rei. Once the shots had passed through, it began to kick   
and tear at Unit 00, fighting like a scared child. Unit 01 had gotten up and began firing a   
continuous stream into the target. Unit 02 joined in and the angel remained transparent, flailing   
and screaming. After several minutes it vanished. Misato looked up at a clock. It was   
approaching noon.  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
Rei looked up from her bed in the Nerv hospital. This ceiling was very familiar. She noticed   
that there were several tubes connected to her body: an I.V., electrode to monitor heart beat, one   
for brain waves, and other tubes with unknown purposes. There was a searing pain shooting all   
the way from her left calve to her stomach. Her throat was bandaged and gauged. 'Emi   
Jinchino,' she thought. 'You have to stop this now.'   
  
************************************************************************  
  
That afternoon the children went to work at the group home. They walked in silence. Once   
there Asuka ran up to Emi's room nearly knocking down Aibu. "Boys!" she told the child.   
"They are such jerks!" Emi was looking at a book. It was a Disney book, opened to the inner   
cover. A plethora of characters from the movies filled the page. The red head took a seat behind   
the boy and he leaned up against her. She laid a hand on the book, this was taken by Emi who   
used it to point at the characters. Asuka commented on each one, "Oh, she's pretty."  
  
"Look, he's flying."  
  
"That's a mouse, I think. He's not as cute as Diddle though."  
  
Sometimes it seemed Emi was laughing at her weak descriptions. After they had "read" the   
book for a while he turned around and hugged the Second Child. She welled up with pride and   
affection.  
  
*************************************************************************  
  
Shinji pushed Natsumi in the swing for almost two hours. He had been trying to talk about   
childlike things, but there was only one thing on his mind. "Why are girls so silly?" he asked at   
last  
  
"Nani?" the young child was obviously bewildered.  
  
"Girls expect you to read your mind. I don't like that."  
  
"You're funny, Shinji," Natsumi remarked before her expression went blank.  
  
Shinji looked at his watch. It was time to go. He waited for the little girl to come out of her   
petit mal, said goodbye, and went inside. His roommate came bounding down the stairs. Seeing   
him, she slowed her step. They walked out together.  
  
Finally Asuka had to talk, though she hated being the one to break the silence. "I love Emi!" she   
exclaimed.  
  
"That's great." Shinji replied. There was a long, painful silence while he contemplated his next   
remark. He was terrified that he would say something wrong. "Look, I'm sorry that I don't   
always know what to do."  
  
"Don't apologize. You are always apologizing, even when it's not your fault!" She softened.   
"Like now. I overreacted. Don't worry about it."  
  
"Hai."  
  
The red head smiled inwardly at her roommate's trained response.  
  
When they arrived home they found their guardian in her suit, preparing to leave. "I'm going to   
work this evening," Misato explained. "We are going to develop a plan for tomorrow morning."  
  
"Shouldn't we be there too?" Asuka demanded as she put her school things away.  
  
"No, you guys deserve a break. Here," she handed Shinji a wad of cash, "order dinner in and get   
yourselves a movie."  
  
"Are you sure?" Shinji chimed in.  
  
"Yes, now enjoy yourselves for once!"  
  
"Hai!" The two determined that they would do just that.  
  
Once Misato was gone, Shinji picked up the phone and dialed the Chinese restaurant next to the   
video store. He ordered for himself, then handed the phone to Asuka and got their coats. When   
Asuka was finished he helped her on with her jacket. She giggled.  
  
"Nani?" Shinji was afraid he had done something wrong.  
  
"It's nothing. You're just . . . cute." She smiled.  
  
The dark haired boy blushed very visibly as they left the apartment.  
  
At the video store Asuka mentioned that she had never seen a Disney movie.  
  
"They're okay, I guess. But they're for little kids," her roommate informed her.  
  
"Well I would really like to see one."  
  
"Why?"   
  
"I just want to okay!"  
  
"Fine." Shinji didn't want to ruin the nice evening they were having. "Well. . . lets start at the   
beginning." he said, taking 'Snow White' off the shelf.  
  
"Great!" replied Asuka flashing him another smile.  
  
Shinji was beginning to love that smile. He paid for the movie and the two went to pick up their   
food. They walked back, happily chattering about their day at school and with the children. At   
home they took their food to the living room and started the movie. They ate and watched in   
silence until the Evil Queen started plotting. Then Asuka bolted upright.  
  
"She's trying to kill her daughter?" the girl quivered.  
  
"Well, it's not really her daughter; it's her step-daughter, and it's just a cartoon."  
  
Asuka just repeated, "She's trying to kill her daughter." She was staring straight ahead and   
rocking slightly back and forth. Shinji didn't know what was going on, but he could tell that   
Asuka was in pain. He reached over and took her by the shoulders. She folded into his chest and   
he wrapped her tightly in his arms. Suddenly she burst into a torrent of tears. She was shaking   
and shuttering.   
  
"What's wrong, Asuka?" Shinji genuinely wanted to know. He would kill whomever had done   
this to the second children. He finally caught on to something. Quietly he questioned, "Did your   
mother do something to you?"  
  
Asuka buried herself deeper into him. Eventually she was composed enough to sputter out a   
sentence. "Shinji, just hold me, okay?"  
  
"Sure, Asuka," he said quietly, "Sure."  
  
"Parent's suck!" She spat the words.  
  
"Yeah they do." Shinji whole heatedly agreed.   
  
*****************************************************************************  
  
Misato glared up at the two people towering over her. Ritsuko had told her to sit down because   
the news might be a bit shocking, but the colonel had the feeling that her sitting gave the scientist   
and the commander the advantage of looking down on her.   
  
Collecting herself, Misato spoke slowly and deliberately. "You are telling me that Nerv   
monitors the brain waves of civilians?"  
  
"It's not like that," the blonde interjected. "We do a broad sweep of the area. It's much like the   
technology that helps locate the angels. We don't track individual brain waves unless we find   
something suspicious."  
  
"Well, what have you found, Big Brother?" Misato's voice was dripped with sarcasm.   
  
"That is why you were called here," Gendo began to explain. "A few weeks ago we got suspect   
readings from a certain area. We traced the pattern to the group home, specifically to Emi   
Jinchino."  
  
Ritsuko took over. "There was a blue tinge to his pattern. He was definitely a human, but linked   
to the angels. It seemed that in his mind was the seed or beginning of an angel. He was   
somehow able to create this angel and control its actions. We knew that this was coming but we   
didn't know when. Figuring that two children doing volunteer work would be more humane than   
a surveillance team. . ."  
  
"You mean less suspicious," Misato hissed.  
  
"Right," Ritsuko continued calmly. "We had Asuka do the observations."  
  
"I don't believe this! The dark haired woman was close to loosing it. "You took risks with   
Asuka's emotions just to save yourselves some inconvenience!"  
  
Gendo was ready to end this meeting. Having his morals brought into question wasn't   
something he generally stood for. "We are not sure if this angel belongs to the boy. You will   
have Asuka observe his actions tomorrow morning when the angel attacks."  
  
"I understand," Misato snarled. She composed herself for her next question. "Are we going to   
evacuate the citizens tonight?"   
  
"No," Ritsuko said. "We need an accurate reading so we don't want to alarm him. Plus we are   
not sure that the angel will attack again, and with all the problems we have been having with the   
budget and the public, it doesn't seem wise to take unnecessary actions."  
  
"But people will be killed."  
  
"Only a very few," replied Gendo, "and the third children can keep the angel from doing much   
harm. The sacrifice is necessary."  
  
Misato seriously considered resigning then and there. She didn't want to be a part of any   
organization that manipulated others. However, her desire to defeat the angels overcame her   
reservations. She needed to win and Nerv provided the only method to achieve her goals. "Is   
there anything else?" She hissed.  
  
"No, that will be all," the commander smiled.   
  
Misato silently got up and left the room.  
  
The scientist and commander shared knowing glances. Of course the could count on Colonel   
Kasuragi.  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
The colonel arrived home still in a state of rage. When she noticed that Shinji was holding his   
roommate on the couch, she had to smile. 'It's about time,' she thought. Then she noticed   
Asuka's tear streaked cheek, the half eaten Chinese dinners getting cold at their feet and the way   
Shinji was doing his best to comfort the girl. She motioned to Shinji, indicating that she needed   
him in her room. Letting him know that there was no hurry she rushed to her bed and lay down.   
How was she going to tell Asuka?  
  
Shinji looked down at the seraph in his arms. He was astounded at how frail her confidence and   
strength really were. She had always made herself out to be so powerful, but she was really just   
a scared little child, she was really just like him.  
  
The tears were mostly dried on her face and her breathing was becoming heavier and longer.   
Her eyes had been closed for a long while. "Asuka?" he whispered. Realizing that the girl had   
cried herself to sleep, Shinji gently eased her out of his embrace and lay her on the couch. He   
knocked on Misato's door.  
  
"Shinji?"  
  
He entered, "Yes."  
  
"What happened to Asuka."  
  
"I don't know. We were just watching 'Snow White' and she started bawling. She mentioned   
something about parents. Do you know anything about this?"  
  
Misato nodded slightly. "She's had it rough. I don't think I can explain it to you without   
betraying her trust. Just understand that the earliest years of life were not easy for her, as they   
were hard for you. What is she doing now?"  
  
"She fell asleep on the couch."  
  
"Arigato, Shinji."  
  
"No problem." The dark haired boy could tell that there was something bothering his guardian.   
However, he knew from experience that Misato would share what she intended to share, no   
matter what he did or said. Slowly he walked to his room.  
  
The dark haired woman sat down next to her ward on the couch. She rubbed the second   
children's back for a while. "Asuka?"  
  
"Hai," came the resigned response.  
  
"I have some bad news." She related exactly what she had been told by Ritsuko and Commander   
Ikari.   
  
Asuka's eyes grew big and tears welled up a second time. "I don't believe it! Emi is not an   
angel!"  
  
"No one is saying that he is. We know he is human; we just need to know if he had anything to   
do with this angel."  
  
"And what if he does?"  
  
"I don't know." This was a lie. Misato had a very good idea what Gendo would order done to   
the boy who created angels, but there was no way she was upsetting the second children any   
more than necessary. Besides, the look in Asuka's eyes told her guardian that she also knew the   
answer. Saying it would only intensify her emotions.  
  
"Fine," said the red head quietly and she ran to her room.  
  
***************************************************************************  
  
The next day Asuka showed up at the group home very early in the morning. She asked the staff   
there if they noticed anything different about Emi in mornings.  
  
"He doesn't do well with mornings," said a girl with short black hair. "It just started a few days   
ago." "We have been letting him tantrum until it gets close to noon."  
  
'So what,' thought the red head, 'Lots of kids have difficult mornings.' She went up to the little   
boy's room. The Disney posters lining the walls brought back a sharp image of the night before.   
Cold tears formed behind her eyes. Determined, she held them back and sat down on the floor.   
She didn't have to fight tears long for within minutes Emi woke. He let out a scream and ran   
down the stairs, crying and kicking. It wasn't like a normal tantrum. Sometimes it seemed he   
was tearing at the air, other times he grabbed objects to throw.   
  
"What's wrong?" Asuka yelled.  
  
Seeing her for the first time that morning, the boy ran away from her, outside. She followed   
quickly, and then she saw it. The angel was fighting Unit 01 a few blocks away. Every motion   
that the angel did was mirrored by Emi, and vice versa. It didn't seem that Emi controlled the   
angel, more that they were somehow linked. Each controlled the other mutually. Emi was   
obviously in pain. He wanted this to stop and Asuka wanted desperately to stop it for him.  
  
Shinji's Eva fired on the angel, which was running away from the threat, towards the group   
home. The second children tore at the little boy, trying desperately to get him to stand still. It   
was no use. Emi ran in place, and the Angel ran towards them. Unit 01 was following closely   
behind the angel.   
  
The beast was desperate to find a way to get the Evangelion to stop chasing it. The way was   
discovered in the form of a red headed girl. Recognizing the pilot, the angel grabbed Asuka.   
She screamed and fought to free herself, but the angel help up his prize so Shinji could see. The   
third children stopped cold, terrified that the slightest more would cause the angel to harm its   
captive.   
  
Above the screaming of the second children, the roaring of the angel, and confusion of people   
everywhere, a single voice could be heard. It was a clear, strong sound, and it was coming from   
Emi. "Stop!"  
  
The angel and boy disconnected, their movements no longer simultaneous. The beast looked at   
the boy, then at the girl in his hand. Screaming, it opened it's hand and set Asuka harshly on the   
ground. Then with a final cry, it vanished.  
  
*****************************************************************************  
  
  
  
Author's note: I'll try to get chapter two out as quickly as possible. I hope you liked this.   
Thanks so much for reading.   



	2. 

Author's Note: Thanks, everyone, for the reviews!   
  
PsychoJoe: thanks, I'll try to keep the little stuff strait, that mess up with   
the units during the first   
battle was really embarrassing :( As they say, the heart of the story is in the   
details. Any ideas   
on how I can make the characters less "off"?  
  
Cilia: thanks a lot! I like how you think.  
  
Rhine: Thanks, I got her ranks confused, I have changed Misato to a major now.   
Man, there are   
too many things to keep strait! Well, that's what reviews are for! I also   
appreciate the feed back   
on my descriptions and thoughts of the characters. I know they are too sparse,   
but they are the   
hardest things for me. They are also what makes a good story great. I'll work   
on it. If you read   
this chapter please tell me how I am doing. It was also good to hear from   
someone who has   
worked with people with disabilities. I am very glad you are enjoying the fic.  
  
I don't own the NGE characters. The story, Emi, and Natsumi are mine. I'm not   
making money   
off this, nor do I want to, respite work pays very well. If you would like to   
send money, make all   
checks payable to the Epilepsy Foundation of America or the Autism Society of   
America. Just kidding! I hope   
you like the next chapter.  
  
*****************************************************************************  
  
He Who Talks to Angels  
Chapter 2  
  
By Veronica Cereta  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
Asuka had been hoping that Emi would say something for the past couple of weeks.   
She had   
assumed that when he did, it would be an exhilarating moment. However, his   
first word left her   
filled with terror. She knew what that word meant to everyone at Nerv, and she   
knew what   
would happen because of it. She ran up and hugged the little boy. He allowed   
himself to be   
embraced, remaining limp and motionless.   
  
Unit 01 slowly walked back to headquarters, glancing back at the girl and boy   
from time to time.   
Shinji was confused, but he understood one thing very well. Asuka was the most   
important   
person in his life at the moment. He hated his father for using her, and even   
more for what he   
was sure his father would do next. He also decided that he would protect the   
second children no   
matter what and that meant protecting Emi. They would get through this   
together, somehow,   
thought Shinji has he made his way back.   
  
"You saved me!" Asuka cried as she held her assigned child. "Arigato. Thank   
you. Thank you.   
But now you're in trouble. I won't let them hurt you." She loosened her grip   
on the child and he   
ran to his spot by the trees. "I won't let them hurt you," the second children   
repeated firmly.  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
"Every movement he made was mirrored by the angel and every movement the angel   
made was   
mirrored by Emi. It wasn't like he was controlling the angel; it was like they   
were linked. I   
don't think either was in command." Asuka gave her verbal report to Commander   
Ikari. She   
knew that she was sentencing the little boy to death, and that made this one of   
the more painful   
things the girl had ever done, but it couldn't be helped. Everyone had watched   
Unit 01, and all   
of Nerv had heard Emi's first word. There was no point in her trying to hide   
the truth. She   
wondered why she was even giving this stupid report.  
  
"Well, it's simple," Gendo gave a slight sideways smile. "Killing the child   
will destroy the   
angel."  
  
"No!" Asuka yelled. "Emi doesn't want to do this. It hurts him. He hates it."  
  
"Asuka," Ritsuko tried to reason, "killing Emi isn't a punishment. We don't   
want to hurt him. It   
is simply the only way we can defeat the angel."  
  
"No, there has to be another way."  
  
"Asuka's right!" Shinji came to her aid. "We are not assassins. We have always   
dealt with the   
angels on our own. We can do this."  
  
"How?" Gendo stared down with disgust at his only son. He wasn't proud of him   
for choosing   
to fight the angel. It only disgusted him that Shinji was not willing to do   
what needed to be   
done.  
  
"I . . . I don't know," he admitted. "But I will not kill another human being."  
  
"Nor will I," Asuka seconded.  
  
"I will do it." A bandaged Rei looked up from the chair that the doctors had   
carefully set her   
into.  
  
"You!" shrieked the red head. "You can't even move!"  
  
"I will be able two in a day or two, and since neither of you are willing, I   
will have to do it."  
  
"Rei, how could you?" Shinji was aghast.  
  
"It has to be done."  
  
"I hate you, Ayanami!" Asuka shrieked.   
  
Commander Ikari simply smiled at the first children. He admired her sense of   
duty, and her   
willingness to take on tough assignments. In his mind the other two pilots   
weren't noble for not   
wanting to kill, they were weak. They would allow countless people to die in   
order to save one.   
However, he could see that ordering them to kill would not change that. "Fine,   
Rei will do it in a   
few days."  
  
"Father! I want permission to attempt to destroy the angel before Rei carries   
out her   
assignment." Shinji spat out the last word fiercely.  
  
The same half smile flickered across the commander's face. "Of course, you   
may."   
  
"I will help." The pilot of unit 02 was resolute.  
  
"Fine," replied Gendo, "Tomorrow morning units 01 and 02 will attack the angel.   
If they are   
unsuccessful, Rei will complete the mission as soon as possible."  
  
"Should we evacuate the civilians tonight?" Misato thought of the casualties of   
the last two   
battles.  
  
"No." Gendo was short  
  
"Nani!"   
  
"By now the citizens have figured out the pattern. They will evacuate   
themselves. It will only   
waste Nerv money and resources to force an evacuation."  
  
This was a lie. Misato knew it. Commander Ikari realized that government   
organizations   
wouldn't evacuate without an order. Yes, the citizens would leave, but not   
those in government   
positions. That meant the group home, which was staffed through tax money,   
would remain.   
Emi would still be inside Tokyo Three. Misato realized that the commander was   
counting on   
Emi being there for the battle. She angrily wondered what he was planning.  
  
*****************************************************************************  
  
Asuka didn't go to school that afternoon. She wanted to see Emi. Shinji   
offered to come with   
her, but she felt it would be better if she could be alone. She looked up at   
the wooden house   
before knocking softly. Aibu opened it and stepped aside. He had learned to   
steer clear of the   
red head, for fear of being yelled at.   
  
"Hi, Aibu," Asuka said.  
  
"Hi!" he replied happily. He was going to comment on her appearance, but   
decided not to press   
his luck. "Are you here to see Emi?"  
  
"Hai."  
  
"He likes you. He is happy when you are here."  
  
Asuka fought a tear. "Domo Arigato, Aibu." She went to Emi's room.  
  
The little boy was spinning blocks around in the yellow pail. He handed it to   
Asuka when she   
entered. She smiled and sat down. She still didn't quite have the right   
technique for spinning   
blocks. Sighing she handed the bucket back to Emi. He looked at her intently.   
Something was   
very different about his companion, but the child had no idea what. He picked   
up a book from   
the floor beside him and nestled into the girl's lap. Asuka felt her world come   
crashing down.   
How could the organization that she had worked for all her life order this boy's   
death? The child   
meant so much to her. He had taught her about trust, patience, and a world   
outside her own   
experience. I had showed her that it was okay to love someone, because   
eventually they would   
come around and return that love in some form. How could they take his life?   
  
Asuka looked at the cover of the book. It was a picture of a couple horses   
running through a   
field. She opened the book and allowed Emi to take her hand and use it to   
point.  
  
"That's a Clydesdale."  
  
His hand was so soft and warm.  
  
"That's an Arabian."  
  
Suddenly, she got a devilish idea. Wanting to break from her depressing   
thoughts she lifted the   
hand that Emi was holding, and tickled him under his arm. He squealed with   
delight as he rolled   
over onto his back, looking up at the girl. When she stopped her assault, he   
began to tickle her.   
It didn't really tickle, but Asuka laughed just the same. Then she looked   
contemplatively at Emi.  
  
It was nerve-racking to be sitting with the boy who just hours ago had commanded   
an angel to   
release her. The two were acting like it was just another average day. She   
loved being with Emi,   
but she couldn't put the past events out of her mind.  
  
"Emi, why did this happen?"  
  
The boy looked up at her then laughed. He didn't understand. All he knew was   
that the usually   
loud and energetic red head was now quiet and withdrawn. He had no idea what   
this could   
mean, and it struck him as odd, which made him laugh. Asuka knew that he didn't   
mean   
anything by it. She ruffled his hair and looked back down at the book. Emi had   
resumed   
pointing.  
  
"That's a Quarter Horse."  
  
They sat, looking at pictures for close to an hour. Eventually the second   
children could no   
longer take it. It was just too much to be with a boy who could control an   
angel, a boy who had   
been sentenced to death that morning. She got up and went to the door. Emi got   
up as well. He   
craned his neck and pushed out his lips. Asuka leaned over, and he kissed her.  
  
"Good bye, Emi." She wasn't even out of the home before the tears began to flow.  
  
Everything blurred together as the second children walked. The world looked   
like an oil painting   
that had been sprayed with water before it had dried. Life had been so good the   
past few days.   
Her work with Emi, her relationship with the third child and even her work at   
Nerv had been   
fantastic. However, with the arrival of the angel the three had blurred into a   
painfully distorted   
picture.  
  
**************************************************************************  
  
Shinji half-heartedly tried to concentrate on his history lesson. The old   
professor droned on   
about things that interested the boy very little. Besides, half of what was   
said was made up by   
the government to cover some activity with the angels. Shinji knew the real   
history better than   
his teacher did. He allowed his mind to wander and glanced over at the first   
children. She had   
surprised everyone by coming to school. It was evident that she would soon be   
able to carry out   
her mission. He and Asuka had very limited time to destroy the angel and save   
Emi.  
  
During lunch, Shinji sought out Rei. He looked around to make sure they were   
alone in the   
schoolyard. "Why did you agree to it?"  
  
"Agree to what?" Rei responded.  
  
"Killing the child."  
  
The blue haired girl was silent for a long moment. "It was the plan from the   
start."  
  
"Nani?"  
  
"Commander Ikari found out about this child. He planned for you two to do   
surveillance, and   
me to do the assassination. He knew that you would become attached, and that I   
would have to   
step in."  
  
"But how could you kill another human being?"  
  
"It is our duty to defeat the angels. Killing one person will save countless   
others. It has to be   
done."  
  
"Stop saying that! It doesn't have to be done. We will find a way!" Shinji   
couldn't be around   
the coldness of the first children any more. He ran back to the sanctuary of   
Toji and Kensuke.  
  
She watched him go. "I hope you are right Ikari, Shinji. I don't want to kill;   
I hope you are   
right."  
  
*****************************************************************************  
  
Fuyutsuki stood before Commander Ikari's desk. The commander was smiling.  
  
"We may not have to use Rei after all." His eyes fairly danced between his   
reflective glasses.  
  
"Nani?" The gray haired man was confused. "Wasn't that the plan?"  
  
"Yes, but she doesn't want to do it. She'll do it dutifully, but it will hurt   
her. It's best not to   
cause undo stress to the children."  
  
"You are starting to sound like Misato. What are you planning."  
  
"The second and third children will battle the angel in Tokyo Three tomorrow.   
Emi will be in   
town. I believe the third children can be persuaded to kill the boy, if he   
believes it will save   
someone else that he cares about."  
  
"Won't that put more stress on your son?" Fuyutsuki was beginning to see where   
Ikari was   
going.  
  
"An accidental death during a battle is easier to cope with than a planned   
killing."  
  
"I see."  
  
*****************************************************************************  
  
The red headed girl looked up through her tears. She was standing in front of   
the video rental   
store. This afternoon definitely called for a cute movie and a package of ice   
cream. Looking   
through all the isles, she could find nothing that interested her. Reluctantly   
she decided to give   
Disney another try. They couldn't be all bad. Just to be sure, she chose one   
that couldn't   
possibly have trouble with a mother. This one didn't even have people, and the   
deer on the front   
of the box was simply adorable.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Shinji couldn't get home quickly enough. He fairly ran through the   
neighborhoods, trying to get   
to Asuka. How could he have left her alone all day? He wanted to be there for   
her, so what had   
driven him to go to school? Sure, she had told him to go, but he could have   
refused; he should   
have refused. Why didn't he refuse? Was he afraid of how quickly their new   
relationship was   
moving? It couldn't be helped. This was a traumatic time for her, and he   
really wanted to be   
there. Was he scared of being alone with his shattered beauty? That didn't   
make sense. He was   
reasonably sure that he was falling for her, and as previously stated he   
desperately wanted to be   
there for her. Why were his actions so cowardly and mysterious, even to him?   
  
The boy rushed into the small apartment. He threw open the door to her room.   
She wasn't there.   
The sound of the television and the quiet crying of a scared girl floated down   
to hallway towards   
him. He raced into the living room, thinking only of the second children.   
  
As he entered the living room, he ducked, to dodge the video box that came   
flying towards him   
from across the room. Asuka was standing before him in all her furious glory.   
"What kind of   
sadistic parents make their kids watch this crap!" Her eyes were a bit red and   
puffy, but the tears   
were gone.   
  
The third children stooped down to pick up the box. 'Bambi.' "Asuka, this   
probably wasn't the   
best movie for you to watch."  
  
"Gee, do you think?"  
  
"Do you want to talk?" Shinji needed to know what had gone wrong in the second   
children's   
past. He wanted to help her, but had no idea where to start.  
  
"Yeah," said Asuka, "We need to plan for tomorrow morning."  
  
"Right." The third children was a bit disappointed, but of course it was to be   
expected. There   
was one thing his roommate cared about more than anything at the moment. The   
best thing   
Shinji could do was to help her with this.   
  
The two sat down at the kitchen table. They were silent for a long while. It   
was hard to decide   
where to start. How do you defeat an enemy that you can't even touch? After   
several minutes of   
pretending to plan, they realized that there was nothing they could do.  
  
"We have to try." Asuka was adamant.  
  
"I know."  
  
"I won't let him die."  
  
"Neither will I."  
  
The second children looked at her dark haired roommate. Why did he care so much   
about this?   
Was it because she cared? Was his concern for Emi really concern for her, or   
was Shinji just the   
kind of great guy who cares deeply about everybody. Either way, it warmed her   
heart. He really   
wasn't that bad. Sure she found him cowardly, and stupid, and skinny, and   
childish, and   
countless other things, but he had held her last night when she needed it, he   
always looked out   
for her, and now he was going to battle for her. She snapped herself from her   
thoughts.  
  
"We better get some rest," she mentioned, standing up.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
Then she did something neither child had expected. She bent down and kissed him   
tenderly on   
the lips. Shinji started. What was she doing? Was she toying with him? No,   
it didn't feel like   
that. This tenderness was so out of character for his roommate. Being with Emi   
had really   
effected her. He kissed back, trying with all his might to give her, in that   
single kiss, his   
strength, his will, his life.  
  
Asuka was a bit surprised. Shinji wasn't such a bad kisser when he wasn't   
fighting for air. She   
had the feeling he truly cared about her, and that was a nice change. It felt   
wonderful to be with   
someone who knew the real her and loved her anyway. For a moment she   
contemplated slipping   
into the pilot's lap and allowing the moment to go where it would, but thinking   
the better of it,   
she pulled away.  
  
She quickly shattered from the moment, regaining her cold, abrasive air. "Just   
don't screw up   
tomorrow, Third Child!" she said before running to her room.  
  
Shinji stared after her. Reaching a hand up, he fingered his lips. The warm   
tingly feel of his first   
real kiss remained for a few moments. He imagined that he was beginning to   
understand Asuka.   
The indifferent front she put up was exactly that, a front. She tried to keep   
safe from being hurt   
by others. By not getting too close she could avoid the pain that had dominated   
her past. He   
didn't quite know what that pain was, but he understood her defense. In many   
ways she was a   
lot like him, he thought as he dropped his hand from his mouth. Shinji left for   
his room grinning.  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
Misato got up to drive her two wards to headquarters before the angel attacked.   
Due to the   
ordeal awaiting them, as well as the early morning drive after a sleepless   
night, the mood was   
somber. The major decided to break the heavy silence and express her thoughts.   
  
"This is a very brave thing, taking this on by yourselves."  
  
The children stared strait ahead, barley noticing the comment. They were both   
searching their   
brains for some form of a plan, anything that would increase their slim chances.  
  
"Do you guys have a plan?" Misato asked, as if reading their minds.  
  
"No," replied Shinji.  
  
There was silence for the rest of the drive.  
  
Immediately after reaching headquarters the two children got into their plug   
suits and boarded   
their Evas. The mechas were activated and all but launched.  
  
"We can do this," Shinji tried to reassure the second children.  
  
"I hope you're right," was her slow reply.  
  
Shinji wanted to say more, but he was interrupted. The equipment in the control   
room indicated   
the presence of the angel.   
  
Misato looked at Gendo; he was smiling. His confident, careless smile set   
against the backdrop   
of an impossible battle caused the major to shiver. Looking quickly away she   
shouted,   
"Launch!"  
  
The two Evangelion were propelled to the surface. As they emerged they noticed   
the angel far   
off in the distance, in the direction of the group home. Gendo nodded with   
satisfaction. Maybe   
this would be even easier than he thought.  
  
Units 01 and 02 both fired volleys. The angel went transparent as usual.   
Shinji had faintly   
hoped that it would have somehow lost that ability giving them a chance for a   
fair fight. "What   
now?" He asked his partner.  
  
"I have an idea." Asuka was gaining her bold, energetic air as the battle raged   
on. She lived to   
combat angels. It made her come alive. "You fire and I'll try to hold on to   
the angel." Unit 02   
raced towards the angel. Shinji got ready with the gun. He fired and Asuka   
grabbed. It didn't   
work. The angel avoided Unit 02 and ran towards the group home. The two   
Evangelion   
frantically chased the angel.   
  
Eventually Unit 02 and the beast passed the group home and Unit 01 stood right   
outside it. He   
looked down at his feet. There in the back yard was Emi. He wasn't mimicking   
the angel   
though. He was jumping and screaming nonsensical syllables. It appeared to   
Shinji that he was   
trying to make his angel stop. Silently but fervently wishing him luck, the   
third children fired   
again. This time, after changing transparent, the angel turned and fired from   
the red circle in its   
head. The unanticipated attack caught Shinji completely off guard. He watched   
as his gun was   
sliced almost perfectly in half by the shot. As Unit 01 threw down the useless   
weapon the angel   
turned onto Unit 02. It grabbed the Evangelion, holding it by the neck in one   
hand, tearing and   
bashing the brain case with the other.   
  
Misato got on the com. link. "Shinji, I'm sending you another gun."  
  
"Cancel that order."  
  
The major turned on the commander. "What!"  
  
Gendo ignored her and began communication with his son. "Shinji, Asuka will   
die, and you   
can't get to her in time."  
  
The third children watched in terror as the angel pummeled its victim. He could   
hear his   
roommate's screams over the crashing of the metal. "Father!" he shouted,   
realizing he had no   
other option but to trust the commander, "What do I do?"  
  
"Emi isn't controlling the angel anymore, but they are still connected. He is   
still responsible for   
its existence. Kill Emi and the angel will be destroyed."  
  
"Don't do it, Shinji!" came the raspy, yet forceful voice from Unit 02. "I   
would rather die!"  
  
Shinji looked down at the little boy before him, the boy who had saved Asuka's   
live, the boy   
who had opened Asuka's heart. He owed so much to this child. Slowly he took   
out his   
progressive knife. The weapon could rip through an A.T. field. It would slice   
though a human   
like a steak knife through hot butter.  
  
"No, Shinji!" Asuka managed before she lost the power to breathe.  
  
Shinji stared at the boy then at the angel. It was all too hard. Why did it   
always have to be so   
difficult?  
  
"Kill him or Asuka will die." His father was right and Shinji knew it.  
  
Maya spoke, breaking through the third children's thoughts. "There's a crack in   
the front of the   
brain case. We are loosing the pilot!"  
  
"No!" In an instant Shinji made his choice. "I won't loose you now!" With that   
he plunged the   
knife down through the little boy. Emi had no time to scream or run. He simply   
died in a spray   
of blood that made Shinji want to hurl. The angel let out a final shriek and   
vanished. Unit 02   
came crashing to the ground.   
  
Unit 01 ran quickly to its fallen companion. Realizing that he was going to   
eject the entry plug,   
Ritsuko shouted an order. "Shinji, don't touch Unit 02. We are giving Asuka a   
heart massage.   
It is vital that the additional life support inside her entry plug is allowed to   
do its job." The third   
children stared on helplessly. All he could do was watch, and pray.  
  
A painfully faint voice came from Unit 02. "I hate you, Ikari Shinji."  



	3. 

A/N: I don't own Evangelion, only Emi, Natsumi and this story.  
  
GuyverX53 and Average Joe: Don't worry, I love happy endings, too. I think this story has one   
or two more chapters left depending on a couple things. I'll warn you when it's the last chapter.  
  
Cubic Reality: Got it, more depth, thanks for the suggestion.  
  
Sumiki-chan: When I read your review I almost thought about going off in a different direction   
and keeping Emi alive, but then I decided I better stick to the original outline. Anyway, thanks   
so much for the complement. Pitying the characters; it made me feel great.  
  
Everyone who is reviewing: Thanks a lot! I love reviews, even if they just say 'this made me   
happy' or something. It's nice to know what people think. BTW: Any tips on how to write Rei?   
I am completely lost when it comes to what she is like.  
  
Enjoy!  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
He Who Talks to Angels  
Chapter 3  
  
By Veronica Cereta  
  
*****************************************************************************  
  
Shinji sat outside the Nerv traumatic injury division. The cold metal folding chair was sticking   
into his side causing a sharp point of pain. He didn't care, nor did he really take notice at all.   
Thoughts of Asuka were all that occupied his mind: the hope that she was all right, and the   
desperate hope that she would somehow find it in herself to forgive him for what he had done.   
The third children wanted more than anything to go inside the room be there for Asuka, but   
Misato had banned him. She had said that he might get in the way of the doctors. 'What a weak   
lie.' A casket like container into which the second children was placed did most of the work of   
monitoring and keeping the environment healthy. Shinji knew why he wasn't allowed to enter.   
It was because they didn't want Asuka to see him when she woke up. They were afraid that his   
presence would upset, maybe even traumatize her.   
  
He got up and looked in the window to Asuka's room. She was still unconscious, inside the box.   
It would open on it's own once she could maintain life functions by herself. A novice nurse   
stared wearily at him from the corner. The nurse pretended to be taking notes on his patient's   
condition. Shinji had a feeling that the nurse was planning out what he would do if the boy   
disobeyed orders and entered the room. 'Don't worry. I won't cause any trouble.' On the little   
table were the dozen roses Shinji had bought for his roommate. It was a poor way to apologize   
for killing someone, but it was all he could think to do. He heard the click, clack of a person in   
dress shoes approaching but didn't lift his stare from the box. As warm hand was placed on his   
shoulder, he looked up at Misato.  
  
"You did the right thing." Her voice was quiet. "It was the only way to save Asuka."  
  
He silently stared ahead.   
  
"She will realize it in time. You had the strength to do what needed to be done."  
  
He couldn't take it. Killing Emi was the worst thing he had ever done and now Misato was   
telling him what a great thing he had accomplished. This all was too much for Shinji to handle.   
Taking a last look at the casket holding Asuka he bolted down the hall.  
  
Misato stared after him. 'Running away again. Asuka isn't the only one who needs to forgive   
you, Shinji. Somehow, you need to find a way to forgive yourself.' She turned and walked into   
the room.  
  
The third children ran down the hallway and out the front gate of Nerv headquarters. All he   
could think of was putting space between himself and that place. He ran through the streets, not   
really caring where he was going. After a few minutes of desperate running he came upon the   
first children.   
  
Rei was making her way to headquarters. She stared quizzically at Shinji as he approached. She   
wondered slightly when he had taken up jogging. Then she noticed his face. This was not a   
leisurely exercise. Shinji was in pain.  
  
"What are you doing?" She asked, monotony.  
  
Something inside Shinji snapped. All the bitterness and hatred towards everyone and everything   
that had made him kill Emi came funneling down upon the blue haired girl.  
  
"You! You knew!" he shrieked.  
  
"Nani?" She was very confused.  
  
"My father never planned for you to assassinate Emi! I was to kill him all along . . . and you   
knew about it!"  
  
"Shinji . . . no."  
  
"Don't you have a heart at all? Asuka is seriously hurt because of Father and you. I hate you! I   
hate father! I hate you all!"  
  
"Wait," said Rei quietly, but it was too late. The boy was already out of earshot. 'Shinji, I had   
no idea. I would have killed for you. I would do anything for you and your father.' Why was he   
accusing her of this? She told herself that he was just taking out his anger, but the truth was, his   
accusation cut her to the core. She had cared for him ever since that time he had thrown open   
her entry plug with his bare hands, just like his father had done. She wanted to help end his   
suffering, but had no idea how.   
  
A few minutes ago Shinji wouldn't have thought it possible, but after yelling at Rei, he hated   
himself even more. She hadn't done anything wrong. He admitted to himself that she probably   
had no idea about his killing the boy. Even if she did, there was little she could have done to   
help. He was just mad at everyone, and she just happened to be in the way.  
  
The third children believed that there was not a single person to whom he could turn. Everybody   
had lied to or used him. The only person he trusted, the only person he even wanted to care   
about, was lying in a coma; and, even if she were awake, she wouldn't talk to him. As a child,   
Shinji was used to being alone. However, he had just gotten comfortable depending on Misato,   
and opening himself up to Asuka and even Rei. Having those connections ripped away caused   
the most intense pain he had ever experienced. There was no one who cared, no one on whom   
he could rely.   
  
Then he thought of one person who had never lied to him, never used him, never hurt him in any   
way. He ran a few more blocks and finally stood panting in front of the white, wooden house.  
  
**************************************************************************  
  
Misato waved the nurse away and sat down on a three-legged stool. She watched the box,   
praying for it to let out its tell tale hiss and open, indicating that Asuka was conscience. For   
once, her prayers were answered. She jumped from her seat as the box opened.   
  
"Asuka," she was staring down at the second children. "Asuka, don't strain yourself to talk, but   
are you alright?"  
  
The red head nodded slightly. She looked around the room, trying to get her bearings.  
  
Misato glanced up at the window. A horde of doctors, nurses and technicians had gathered to   
monitor the pilot's condition. They were respectfully giving the major her space, but she knew   
that if anything changed or went wrong, they would flood into the room in a heartbeat. That   
meant no mention of the third children. Speaking about Shinji, Emi or anything that might   
remind the girl of the ordeal was strictly prohibited. Misato racked her brain for a   
noncontrovercial topic of conversation.  
  
"So . . . Have you seen any good T. V. shows lately."  
  
Asuka rolled her eyes. "Look, Misato. I feel fine. I can talk about it."  
  
The major glanced up at the doctors. A few of them were nodding in permission. She would   
have gone over their heads anyway, but it was nice that the decided not to put up a fight.   
Looking back down, she began, "Shinji feels terrible."  
  
"I hate him! How could he have done that to me?"  
  
"Asuka!" Misato couldn't believe the selfishness of this girl. After all Shinji had been through   
Asuka couldn't show one ounce of compassion towards him. "He didn't do anything to   
deliberately hurt you." The woman made herself lower her voice and gain control. "He saved   
your life."  
  
"Well I would rather have died!" Asuka yelled at the top of her voice.  
  
"You don't mean that!" Misato shouted as the medics rushed in and huddled around their patient.   
  
"Yes I do! I hate Ikari! I never want to see him again!" She was still yelling as a frantic nurse   
brushed Misato from the room.  
  
Asuka laid back, closed her eyes and refused to speak. Bitter, hateful thoughts raced through her   
mind. She had finally began to open up. She had finally allowed two people to influence her   
life, her feelings. She had finally let down her defenses, and then one went and killed the other!   
She told Shinji not to do it, but that spineless jerk couldn't handle the pressure. If he had just   
waited a moment longer . . . she would have been dead. 'No!' she thought. 'If he had waited   
everything would have been fine! He didn't have to kill Emi!' She would never forgive him for   
this.  
  
"Asuka, can you speak?"  
  
She was a bit surprised that the doctors were still trying to talk to her. "Yes, I can speak, Baka!"  
  
The medical team exchanged looks of relief. "Let's get you go a bed," said a tall, stout man with   
thin glasses and thick black hair. He lifted her out of the box and carried her down the hallway   
to a waiting inpatient area. Laying her in a cold hospital bed, he smiled. "Alright, now we'll   
leave you to your thoughts."  
  
'No, don't. I hate my thoughts. Don't leave me.' From deep inside Asuka screamed at her   
doctor, however her pride wouldn't allow her to speak. She bit her tongue as she watched the   
medical team leave. When they had almost all evacuated, she noticed a slender blonde woman   
placing a bouquet of roses on a corner table.  
  
"Excuse me," Asuka asked politely. "Could you tell me who those are from?"  
  
The woman looked down at the card. "It says Ikari Shinji."  
  
The second children closed her eyes and sighed. "Could you take them with you."  
  
"Nani?"  
  
"Just take them with you, please."  
  
"All right." The woman slowly bent down and took the roses.   
  
After they had left Asuka lay back in bed. She allowed a single tear to trace a line down her   
cheek. Then she forced herself to stop. She wouldn't waste tears on that jerk or what he had   
done! The effort exerted in her attempt not to cry tired her and she fell into a deep sleep.  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
"Hi!" Aibu greeted Shinji happily. "You want to see . . . Natsumi!"  
  
"You guessed it," Shinji replied half heatedly.  
  
"She's in the back yard."  
  
"Arigato." The third children went into the back yard. He shivered. This place was worse than   
Headquarters. The smell of blood almost lingered in the air, blood that he had caused. For a   
moment he considered turning around and going home. Then he thought of Natsumi. She might   
need him and heaven knew he needed her. Shinji looked around for a moment before going back   
to a grove of pines. Pulling aside some of the lower branches he found the young girl in her   
thinking spot.   
  
"Hello, Natsumi."  
  
She looked up. It was evident that she had been crying for some while. "Did you hear?"  
  
"Hear what?"  
  
"Emi died."  
  
Shinji had figured that was what she meant. He wondered how much she knew. "Did they tell   
you anything about it?"  
  
She nodded. "They said that he . . . he . . ." Her face went blank.  
  
Shinji waited patiently for her seizure to subside. After a few moments he asked, "Natsumi?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"What did they tell you about Emi's death?"  
  
"They said that he was hit by a car."  
  
Shinji didn't know whether he should be relieved that they didn't tell her the truth or outraged   
that they had lied to her. After a minute he decided to be relieved. At least there was still one   
person who didn't hate him. "Are you okay?"  
  
She nodded. Wiping away her final tears she asked, "Do you want to play checkers?"  
  
"I would love that."  
  
Shinji stayed put while she ran into to house to get the board. She was going to be fine. Emi and   
her were not particularly close. In a week or two she would stop feeling very sad and in a few   
years she would forget that this had ever happened. The pilot envied her. He would never be   
able to forget what he had done.  
  
She came back skipping and smiling. Shinji was forced to smile back at her. It felt good. It felt   
so good to smile just once after all he had been through. He began to loose himself in the game.   
It was such a simple game. You only had to jump the other person's pieces. There were no   
tough choices, no life changing decisions.   
  
Natsumi won as usual. "I beat you! I won!" She was always so happy after winning. Then she   
looked at Shinji. He looked like he was going to cry. "I'm sorry. You almost won. I'm really   
good, so it's not your fault you lost."   
  
"Oh it's not that." Shinji laughed a little. "I'm just thinking about something else."  
  
"Emi?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
Natsumi jumped around the table and hugged Shinji. He hugged her back with all his might.   
  
She looked up; "You wanna play again?"  
  
"Sure."  
  
"Okay, you'll win this time. I know it!"  
  
Smiling, he put the pieces back onto the board. "Natsumi."  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"I'm really glad that I came over today."  
  
There was no answer. Shinji waited out another seizure.  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
"Mamma! Mamma! They chose me! I am an elite pilot! I'll defend Mankind! I'm the best in   
the world!"  
  
Asuka, as a very little girl, ran towards her house, to where her mom was waiting waiting. She   
yelled to her Mom even before she reached the door.  
  
"I have to keep it a secret, so I'll only tell you, Mamma!"  
  
Her mom would be so proud. Who wouldn't be proud to have their daughter save the world!   
She was such a good kid. The best kid a parent could ask for.  
  
"Everybody is being so nice to me now, I won't feel so lonely any more."  
  
Now her mom would see how great she was. Her mom would put down that stupid doll and   
finally realize that her daughter was wonderful, that her daughter was great, that her daughter   
was there.  
  
"I'm okay now even without papa!"  
  
It will all be okay, because you will see me again; you will be my mamma!  
  
"So look! Look at me!"  
  
I am here!  
  
"Mamma!"  
  
Asuka threw open the door to the house. The room seemed bathed in red light. The shadowy   
figure of a woman hung from a rafter. Next to the woman was the doll. The two swung back   
and forth, the mother and the toy she took for her daughter.  
  
"Mamma . . .Mamma, why? How?"  
  
The woman lifted her head and stared, without recognition, down at her daughter. "Don't worry.   
I'm not alone. I couldn't do it by myself. I needed help."  
  
It was then that Asuka noticed the shadowy figure behind her mother. It appeared to be   
tightening the noose. The figure rubbed its hands together as it stepped out from behind the   
hanging woman and into the red light.  
  
"No!" Asuka screamed at the third children. "Shinji, no!"  
  
The second children bolted upright in bed. She was sweating and panting. Laying back down   
she began to cry into her pillow. She buried her head in it as if trying to wipe out the lingering   
memory of the nightmare.  
  
"Asuka?" Misato had entered the room.  
  
The second children took no notice, but continued to sob.   
  
Misato sat down next to the girl and laid a hand on her back. She sat for a moment feeling her   
hand move up and down as Asuka convulsed a little. She could tell that the red head was trying   
to bring herself under control. She was so stubborn, refusing to cry freely even after a such a   
terrible incident.  
  
"I'm fine," declared Asuka wiping away a tear. "What do you want?"  
  
"Just checking up on you. How are you doing?"  
  
"As well as can be expected!"  
  
Now that there was little chance of the child slipping back into a comma, Misato could talk about   
what ever she liked. She wanted more than anything for Asuka to forgive her roommate.   
"Listen, Asuka, Shinji feels just terrible."  
  
The red head simply nodded.  
  
"He really hates himself."  
  
"He should, after what that baka did to me!"  
  
"Don't you ever . . . don't ever imply that Shinji did anything to deliberately hurt you." The   
major was shaking with rage. "Shinji would never deliberately hurt anyone, especially you. You   
have been through a lot and you need a face to put with this tragedy. Shinji reminds you of all   
the pain, all the sorrow, and so you hate him. And that's natural; that's human. But don't ever   
say that Shinji did the wrong thing! He had to do what he did. He had to save you."  
  
Misato was right and Asuka knew it. Yet the simple fact remained. She hated him. Whether he   
had to do it or not, she hated him for doing it. She didn't know if she could ever forgive him.   
  
*****************************************************************************  
  
Shinji said goodbye to Natsumi and started walking away from the house. She waved from the   
window until he was out of eyesight. Seeing the little girl had been so wonderful. He felt   
relieved, almost peaceful, but at the same very guilty. Asuka couldn't play with Emi any more.   
It wasn't fair. Maybe she would like Natsumi. Shinji found that very unlikely, but it might be   
worth a try.   
  
The guilt was getting unbearable. He had to see if Asuka was okay. That meant going back to   
Nerv. Only a couple of hours had past since he'd left that place, and he didn't want to face it   
again. However, he couldn't just abandon the second children. The time with Natsumi had   
given him the strength he needed to face that place again. Sighing deeply he made his way to   
Headquarters. He walked slowly, thinking about what he would say to Asuka. How could he   
even begin? After a few feeble tries at coming up with something, he decided to just wing it.   
There was nothing he could really do to prepare himself.  
  
As he walked, Shinji looked out over the horizon. The sun was descending, casting pink and   
purple light across the western sky. The boy realized that he hadn't eaten all day, hadn't even   
thought of it. Now his stomach rumbled pitifully. Well, it would have to wait until after he saw   
Asuka.   
  
As he neared the building the third children shuttered. He wouldn't run away this time. He   
would just get in, see Asuka, and get out. It wouldn't be so hard. Shinji forced himself to run   
his key card through the slot. He walked quickly and quietly to the hospital.   
  
He went to board the elevator. As it rumbled to a stop and the doors opened, Shinji stood facing   
his father.   
  
"Why father," he cried, "Why did you make me kill?"  
  
"It was the only way." Gendo's voice was monotone and cold.  
  
"But . . . no, it didn't have to happen!"  
  
"Yes it did." As the doors closed on the commander the boy could here him say, "and the sooner   
you realize that the easier it will be."  
  
No, his father was wrong. He didn't have to kill the boy Asuka cared about. He was cowardly   
and weak and he hated himself for it. Shinji waited for the next elevator and rode it to the floor   
holding Asuka.  
  
When he got to the room he saw Misato sitting on the bed. Asuka was sitting up and the two   
were in a heated discussion. 'Oh, thank God! She's alright!' Shinji felt like crying for joy. He   
watched the two, overcome with relief.  
  
Asuka had been silent as Misato lectured her. She didn't understand why the major was being so   
hard on her. Shinji had killed someone she cared about. She was supposed to hate him, besides   
she couldn't help it.   
  
Misato looked up and saw Shinji. She shook her head. "He's come to see you."  
  
"Shinji?" Asuka was quiet, almost scared. "I just can't, not now."  
  
Misato sighed deeply. "Of course. I understand." She got up and walked out to Shinji.  
  
As the major stepped out of the room the boy called excitedly, "She's alright! Is she really   
okay?"  
  
She smiled. "Yes, Asuka is doing fine."  
  
"Great. I'm going to talk to her now."  
  
"Shinji . . . she's still . . . pretty tired. It would be best if you didn't disturb her."  
  
"Okay. I see." The boy was bitterly disappointed. 'She still hates me is what you really mean,'   
he thought. He looked into the room; 'well at least she got my flowers.' Then he noticed that   
there were no roses in the room. "Misato, didn't you give her my flowers? Did she see them?"  
  
"She . . . asked that they . . . be . . . removed."  
  
"Oh."  
  
Misato's heart broke for the boy. In a pathetic attempt to cheer him up she asked, "Have you   
eaten yet?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Would you like to go out tonight?"  
  
He paused for a moment. "Yes . . . Yes, I would like that."   
  
Asuka sighed with relief as she watched them leave. 'Shinji, I'm sorry. I just can't do it. I still   
love you, but . . . I still hate you.'  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
Shinji gasped as Misato walked out of her room. She had changed into a spaghetti strapped   
black dress with three ruffled tiers on the bottom. Her hair was done up, make up tastefully   
applied and some gold jewelry topped of the ensemble. When she had asked him to dress up, he   
had no idea how fancy she was going to get. Just where were they going anyway?  
  
"We're going to have a great time tonight," She replied in response to his skeptical look.  
  
She was overcompensating. Shinji could tell.  
  
"You look great," she continued.   
  
"Thanks, it's nothing." It really was nothing special, just a dress shirt some black dress pants   
and a thin black tie, but the complement was nice.  
  
  
"Well, let's go." Misato reached out and looped her arm through Shinji's. She led him to the   
car. Shinji felt like he should open the door for her, but he didn't have the keys. Once inside she   
took off almost before the boy had his door shut. They raced through the dark streets of Tokyo   
Three.  
  
"So . . . How are things with Kaji?" Shinji thought that maybe if she was forced to talk she   
would slow down a little. It wasn't that he didn't trust Misato. He just sort of feared for his life.  
  
"Oh, that baka! He just doesn't understand women."  
  
"Neither do I," Shinji said sullenly.  
  
"Yeah, I guess we're a pretty unpredictable bunch, but really, it's not like we try to be difficult.   
Men just don't understand things like emotions or feelings."  
  
Shinji laughed a little. Misato pulled the car up to a very fancy restaurant. The place was huge   
with many large windows. As they got out of the car a valet walked up to park it.   
  
"Be careful with this baby. It's a good little car."  
  
The man looked at the beat up blue car and stifled a laugh. He didn't think anyone would notice   
if he added a few more scratches. Hell, they probably wouldn't notice if he crushed it to a cube.   
He wondered how the thing even ran.  
  
"Yes mamm." The valet got inside and slowly drove away.  
  
The restaurant lobby was carpeted in red. There was a large gold chandelier hanging from the   
center of the high ceiling and a black baby grand piano sitting in a corner. Large green plants   
were in corners, hanging from hooks, and set on tables all over the room. This place definitely   
looked like it was out of Misato's price range.  
  
The major noticed her guest's quizzical look. "This is the place they took me when they were   
trying to recruit me to work at Nerv. Isn't it great? I've been waiting for a reason to come back   
here and well . . . I just thought we could use some cheering up. Besides, I had a little cash saved   
up for a rainy day."  
  
'A little cash?' thought Shinji. 'Must have been an extra bank account!'  
  
A man in a tuxedo approached them.  
  
"Dinner for two tonight?" he asked in a stuffy voice  
  
"Yes," Misato answered.  
  
"Right this way."  
  
They followed the man back through a candle lit dining room. He seated them at a small black   
table towards the center.  
  
"Is this satisfactory?"  
  
"Certainly," Misato beamed.  
  
The man walked off and Misato giggled at Shinji. "Isn't this place cool!"  
  
He nodded. Shinji had never even seen a restaurant like this. He picked up his menu and looked   
at the prices. There was no way the major could afford this. She would be broke for weeks   
because of this meal.  
  
A waiter approached. "Can I start you off with something to drink?"  
  
"Water will be fine for me," the major answered.  
  
"I'll take a water, too."  
  
"All right. I'll be back in a moment."  
  
Misato turned to her guest, "Now Shinji, be sure to order whatever you want. Money is no   
object. This is your night." She gulped as she opened her menu. Somehow she didn't think it   
had been this expensive when Commander Ikari had brought her here. 'I guess when someone   
else is paying . . .'  
  
Shinji decided that he would not order what ever he wanted. He just couldn't do that to Misato.   
The waiter came back with the water. He set the glasses before the couple and took out a   
notepad and pen.   
  
"Are you ready to order?"  
  
"Yes," Shinji replied. "I'll take the soup and a salad."  
  
"Right, soup and a salad. And for the lady?"  
  
"Um . . . the same."  
  
"Okay, that's two soups and salads." The waiter looked down his noise a bit at the couple,   
lamenting how small the tip would be for this meal. He took the menus and headed for the   
kitchen.  
  
"Shinji," Misato scolded. "I told you to order whatever you wanted."  
  
"Well, I wanted the soup and salad."  
  
"Oh, you are incorrigible!"   
  
The boy could tell that she didn't mean it. There was no hiding the relief behind her voice.  
  
"So, how are you holding up?" asked Misato.  
  
Shinji thought about that. He hated his father for making him kill, he hated her and Ritsuko for   
lying to him, he hated himself for . . . for everything, and he wanted more than anything for   
Asuka to speak to him again. "Okay, I guess," was his feeble reply.  
  
The major cocked an eyebrow. She knew that wasn't how he felt, but there was no point   
pressing the issue. "How is school going?"  
  
"Fine."  
  
This forced conversation was beginning to get on the woman's nerves. "Listen, Shinji, Asuka   
knows that you did the right thing."  
  
"How do you know that?"  
  
"Because, I told her."  
  
"Oh." The third children was glad the Misato was trying to help. The major was a powerful ally,   
especially when it came to matters of the heart. Shinji smiled, "Arigato."  
  
"Don't mention it. Things will get better. I promise."  
  



	4. 

  
A/N: There will be one more chapter after this, plus an epilogue. I don't own Evangelion.  
  
Rhine: Thanks for all your reviews. I don't think Rei is OOC in agreeing to kill Emi. I had a   
scene where Gendo tells her he will have Shinji do it, she examines her feelings for Shinji and   
the comander and then decides to do it for both of them even though it will hurt her emensly. I cut   
the scene because it was more fun to have her speak up at the meeting. I also think Gendo would   
have made Shinji kill Emi. I think he cares for Rei and Shinji equally, since he had a hand in   
both of their creations. He meant what he said about acciedents in battle being easier to forget   
than planned killings. You are right, Shinji would have done more to save Emi. I'll fix that in   
the rewrite. Natsumi will give some advice in the next chapter. Thanks for the idea. Thanks for   
the advice on how to write Rei, it was great.  
  
Average Joe: :) Thanks for the idea. I thought up an evil way for Asuka to hurt Shinji. Also   
thanks for the Advice about Rei.  
  
Warren: Glad you liked it. That's one of my favorite parts, too.  
  
Everyone: Thanks so much for reading and reviewing. You guys make me happy. Enjoy the   
next chapter.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
He Who Talks to Angels  
Chapter 4  
  
By Veronica Cereta  
  
*****************************************************************************  
  
Shinji and Misato walked into the apartment much later in the evening. After dinner out with his   
guardian, Shinji almost felt hopeful about the situation. The major always managed to put things   
in the most positive light. However as the third children passed Asuka's empty room, his   
peaceful mood was completely shattered. The truth was, Asuka was very alone, hurting, and   
there was nothing he could do about it.  
  
He slunk to his room and got into bed. Tossing about restlessly, he thought of his red headed   
roommate. From the kitchen he could hear Misato opening a beer. 'Shouldn't she be getting   
ready for bed?' He wondered what Asuka was doing at the moment. Was she lonely, afraid,   
bored? Eventually the boy managed to drift into a tormented sleep.  
  
The events leading up to Emi's death played out in his dream. Misato ordered the two pilots to   
launch. They fought the angel as it led them towards the group home. Then came the most   
terrifying moment of Shinji's frightening existence. The angel had Asuka and was going to   
destroy her. The third children's weapon had been destroyed. He needed another, but one had   
not been provided. 'Why wasn't there another weapon? Was it part of the plan? Could his   
father really be so cruel?' Unfortunately Shinji knew the answer. He had witnessed his father's   
single mindedness often as a child, and later as an Eva pilot. 'Whatever it takes to get the job   
done,' He thought bitterly. So the third children did the only thing he could; he plunged his   
progressive knife down upon Emi. This time, as he was in mid swing, the little boy disappeared,   
and in his place Asuka materialized. She was wearing the yellow dress that she had worn on the   
day they met and smiling up at him trustfully. Shinji tried to stay his hand, but it was, too, late.   
The knife plunged into the second children, dispensing her in a spray of blood.  
  
"No!" he screamed as he bolted up in bed. Shinji stared at the walls of his room. What had he   
done? He hadn't actually killed Asuka, but he had completely destroyed her trust, her openness,   
and possibly her ability to love. Shinji remembered a movie he had seen about a boy who was so   
fragile that he had to live in a plastic bubble in order to keep the harmful elements in the   
environment away from him. Asuka was in an extremely fragile state, secluded from the   
harmful element, otherwise known as Shinji. 'She's alone in her little bubble. That's not right.   
She shouldn't have to be lonely at a time like this. I may be hurtful to her, but I know someone   
who isn't.'  
  
Shinji got up and went to Misato's room. He knocked at the door. There was no answer.   
  
"Misato?" He said quietly. Then louder, "Misato?"  
  
Slowly Shinji slid the door open and looked into the room. It was empty. The boy smiled,   
realizing that Asuka wasn't alone after all. He went back to bed, feeling all the better.  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
Misato had been trying for over an hour to get comfortable in the white easy chair in Asuka's   
room. The major wondered how Shinji was doing. Maybe she should have waited until he was   
asleep, but he had seemed much better after dinner. 'Poor guy. He wants so much to help Asuka   
and she won't even let him get near her. It must be very difficult for him, trying to find   
forgiveness, love, from Asuka, and from himself.'  
  
The red head rolled around a couple of times. 'Can't sleep either?' Misato thought. 'She's been   
through so much lately. I wish I could take her back home, back to familiar surroundings, her   
own room, and Shinji. The sooner she forgives him the better, for both of them.'  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
Shinji woke tired. He hadn't slept very much the past night. The boy kept waking up and   
wondering about his roommate. He was very grateful when morning finally arrived and he could   
visit her again. Even if he couldn't talk to her, he could at least see how she was doing. Shinji   
got up and dressed hurriedly. He fixed himself some toast and ate it before poor Pen-Pen had   
even entered the kitchen. The penguin was feeling a bit neglected these days. 'Sorry,' Shinji   
thought, 'but I've got more important things to worry about.' Feeling a bit guilty, he placed an   
extra piece of toast in Pen-Pen's food bowl. 'There, that ought to help.'  
  
The third children left for headquarters just as the sun was peaking over the horizon. On the way   
he met up with the first children. The two walked in awkward silence for a long while. Finally   
Shinji broke the hush.  
  
"What are you doing up so early?"  
  
She answered quietly, "I have a couple of tests this morning."  
  
"Oh." Shinji had forgotten completely about tests, work, school, and almost every average part   
of his life. Apparently the higher-ups at Nerv understood and were delaying all tests on the   
second and third children. This realization made Shinji hate his father a little less, a very little.  
  
There was more silence. Shinji spoke again, "Listen, Rei. I fell bad about what I said."  
  
"Don't."  
  
"Nani?"  
  
"I know you were upset." Their eyes met for a brief moment.  
  
"Oh," said Shinji, as the gaze was broken. Again silence prevailed. Talking to the first children   
would never be easy, but the boy was beginning to get the hang of it. 'The moments of silence   
aren't always bad,' he realized, 'just normal parts of the conversation, often as important as the   
words.  
  
This time Rei spoke up. "I didn't know about the plan."  
  
"I know."  
  
Rei almost smiled. They walked the rest of the way in silence, but this time it wasn't forced. It   
was peaceful and appreciative. It was the silence that sometimes exists between two friends who   
are close enough not to fear it.  
  
When the two reached Nerv, they quickly swiped their cards and entered. Shinji hurried to   
Asuka's room. He was very surprised when he noticed the first children following him.  
  
"Ayanami, are you visiting Asuka, too?"  
  
She paused for a moment. "I am a concerned about the second children as well." She couldn't   
tell him the real reason; that she wanted to be there for him. She herself did know exactly why   
she wanted to help him. The girl only knew that she cared about what Ikari was going through.  
  
Shinji smiled as he almost ran to the elevator. His smile faded as the doors opened to reveal the   
commander. However, he was much too excited to see Asuka to let his father slow him down.   
Shinji and Rei stepped on to the elevator and faced forward. They road in silence for a minute,   
then Commander Ikari spoke.  
  
"The pilot of Unit 02 is being released today. Misato is taking her home . . . I thought you   
should know."  
  
Shinji paused for a long time. "Arigato," was his quiet reply. This always happened. As soon   
as Shinji really began to hate his father, he started acting decent. It was because of this that he   
could never truly hate his father for very long. It was because of this that he felt so weak and   
helpless when talking to the man.  
  
Gendo nodded.  
  
The elevator stopped and Shinji hurried away. Rei slowly walked after him. The boy peered   
into Asuka's room. It was empty; he was too late. He ran to the window just in time to see   
Misato driving away from headquarters. 'Damn!' He would have to walk all the way home to   
see her.   
  
Rei watched Shinji watch the car. He seemed upset about having to wait to see his roommate.   
For a reason that Rei was unaware of, this fact saddened her. She decided not to think about it.   
'There are tests to be run,' she thought as she silently walked away.   
  
Shinji walked out into the hall and looked for the blue haired girl. He wasn't surprised when he   
couldn't find her. By now he was used to her somewhat antisocial ways. Sighing deeply he   
headed for home and Asuka.  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
Misato looked over at her passenger. Asuka was staring up at the sky though to window.  
  
"Feeling better?" the major asked.  
  
"Hai, a little." She sighed. Physically she felt fine, but emotionally . . . "Misato?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Do you know about Shinji and me. I mean before the . . . incident?"  
  
"I have my suspicions."  
  
"Well, I kind of liked things that way." She raised her voice a bit. "I mean he is a complete   
baka, and a coward, but . . . he's somehow not that bad."  
  
Misato smiled knowingly. There was something about Shinji, something in his peaceful, quiet   
manner that drew you in and made you want to like him.  
  
Asuka continued, "But I hate him so much! Even though I want to, I don't think I can ever   
forgive him for what he did."  
  
Misato thought for a minute. "Asuka, forgiveness isn't always something that just happens.   
Sometimes you have to work at it. Try to be around him and be happy."  
  
"Happy," she scoffed.  
  
"Well, try to interact with him without hating him. Build up a tolerance, then a friendship, and   
then truly forgive him."  
  
Asuka didn't see much sense in what major was saying. If she couldn't forgive him, then she   
couldn't forgive him and that was that.  
  
Sensing the girl's resignation, Misato added, "I know you can do this."  
  
That hit a nerve in Asuka. It made forgiving Shinji a challenge, and Sohryu Asuka Langley was   
not one to back away from a challenge. She wasn't very hopeful about her chances, but it was   
worth a try. Shinji did deserve at least the effort.  
  
***************************************************************************  
  
As Rei sat in her plug suit her thoughts kept drifting back to the third children. Her feelings   
about him were unidentifiable, at least to her, and they had been that way for some time. She   
cared for him, and wanted him to care for her. Was that love? The girl knew nothing of that   
emotion. Having never felt love she couldn't identify it with any degree of certainty. Was it   
friendship, another thing she didn't understand or know? Was this how friends felt? This caring,   
concern and . . . was it . . . desire? She couldn't be certain, couldn't be certain of anything.   
  
"Rei?"  
  
The voice of Ritsuko derailed her train of thought.  
  
"Hai."  
  
"Rei, is there something on your mind today? You're sync. ratio is a bit lower than usual."  
  
The first children thought for a moment. Something was defiantly on her mind, but what could   
she say to the doctor. Like all people on the verge of their first crush, Rei imagined that no one   
on earth had ever felt the way she was feeling.   
  
"No," she finally replied.  
  
"Well, try to concentrate on synchronizing with your Eva," Ritsuko commanded gently.  
  
"Hai."  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
The only thoughts filling Shinji's mind were of Asuka. She was probably home by now. Home,   
where they all belonged. He couldn't wait to get to the small apartment. She had to be okay;   
they released her. She had to be well enough to go home, and that was a major improvement.   
Home; the word sounded wonderful. Her room would no longer be empty, making him feel   
guilty, making him remember. Of course she still hated him. He had a long way to go before   
things would be normal again, and he didn't know if they would ever be completely normal. At   
least they would be together. As a slight breeze blew through the almost empty streets he   
quickened his pace a bit.   
  
******************************************************************************  
  
Asuka stared at the walls of her room. She had told Misato that she wanted to sleep, but that was   
a lie. The second children had done nothing but sleep for the past couple of days. She wasn't   
tired any more, but she just didn't feel up to talking with her guardian. She wondered if Shinji   
was in his room. 'Where else would he be?' She didn't know if she could forgive the boy, but   
she wanted very much to see him.   
  
Sighing, the girl left her room and walked the hall slowly. A shaky hand reached out and   
knocked on his door. No answer.   
  
"Shinji? . . . Shinji no baka, answer me!" She couldn't blame him for being timid after she had   
refused to speak to him for so long. Slowly she slipped the door open. The room was empty.   
'That jerk! He's never here when I need him.' Asuka knew that wasn't true. He had always   
been there when she was sad, confused, or even just bored. Still the thought that he didn't care   
enough to be home when she arrived made her seethe with anger. 'Boys! Refuse to talk to them   
for a couple days and they forget all about you!' Checking to see if Misato was looking, Asuka   
slipped into the first children's room. The room was sparse, a few items on a table were the only   
indications that it was inhabited in at all. 'How can he live with so few possessions?'   
  
She looked over at the bed, remembering her dream. A shiver ran down her spine causing her to   
tremble visibly. Moving towards the table she tried to put such thoughts behind her, but images   
of Shinji kept creeping into her conscience. Not pictures of the real Shinji, but the man from her   
dream, and the monster who had been forced to kill Emi. 'Those aren't Shinji,' she tried to tell   
herself. 'That is just how you see him now.' It was no use. The person kept returning, the   
person that she hated more than anything.   
  
Her gaze shifted to a device on the table. 'He must have left in a hurry this morning. He's never   
without this.' She picked up the SDAT and caressed it with her fingertips. 'This is Shinji's   
escape. This is where he goes when he can't face the world.' She looked at the tiny ear bugs.   
Then, dropping the device to the floor, she continued. 'I had an escape once, a short-lived   
respite from the world. You ruined it, Shinji.'   
  
"You killed him." As she spoke her last thought aloud she brought her foot down on the SDAT.   
She listened with satisfaction as the machine crunched and creaked under her twisting heal. This   
wasn't right; this wasn't what she'd come in here to do. But it felt so great. 'Why is it so much   
easier to hate someone than to try to love them?' A lone tear traced a path down Asuka's face as   
she thought about what she had lost. She would never get Emi back, and because of her inability   
to forgive, it looked as if Shinji would be lost forever as well.  
  
Trying to stop any more tears, she left Shinji's room and hurried to her own. She buried her   
head in her pillow. 'Why can't I forgive? Am I really that callous? He was trying to save me   
for Christ's sake! Why can't I love?'  
  
*****************************************************************************  
  
"I'm home! Misato! Misato! I'm home!" Shinji began shouting to his guardian from outside in   
the hallway. "Misato! Asuka!" Asuka, Misato, they were all three home together. The boy felt   
as if Asuka had been away for an eternity rather than a couple days. It had all felt so wrong, the   
empty room, the quiet mornings; now it would all be right again. Shinji made himself believe   
that it would all be right again.  
  
He threw the door open. "Misato!"  
  
"Shinji." The major emerged from her room. "Where did you go?"  
  
The third children ignored the question. "Is she here? How is she?"  
  
"Asuka and I arrived home about a half hour ago. I think she's been in her room since. She's   
fine, but . . . Shinji, things haven't changed at all."  
  
The boy's smile disappeared momentarily. "That's okay. I think her being home will help a   
lot."  
  
His guardian smiled and cocked her head. "Me too," she said warmly.  
  
"Misato, would it be okay if I . . ." He glanced towards Asuka's room.  
  
The woman thought for a moment. "I don't think it will hurt. But, Shinji . . . just don't expect   
too much. She's been through a lot."  
  
"Yeah." 'And I put her through it.' He added silently.  
  
Straightening up and clenching his fists, Shinji slowly walked to Asuka's room. He lifted a hand   
and knocked.  
  
"Come in." Came the drained voice of the second children.  
  
"Welcome home." Shinji's smile broadened as he entered the room. They were the first words   
he had spoken to the red head in a long time.  
  
Asuka remained with her head pressed into the pillow, trying to decide how she felt. Part of her   
was excited. She was genuinely happy to see Shinji. She understood how much he cared for her   
and that was what she needed more than anything, someone to care, someone to try to understand   
how she felt.  
  
'But he will never understand. He can't.' From a place deep within the second children came a   
pain, a hatred. 'He hurt me, hurt me more than anyone ever has.'   
  
Shinji carefully moved over to sit beside his roommate. "How are you feeling?"  
  
"Better," she said quietly.  
  
"That's great." Shinji made small talk. 'Little steps,' he thought. 'Don't expect too much from   
her.' "I talked to Rei the other day. They are still running tests . . ."  
  
Asuka's mind wandered as her roommate rambled on. This was a switch. Shinji was talking too   
much. She wanted so much to melt into his arms, to let him hold her so tightly that she felt she   
would never break free. She didn't allow herself to do so; she couldn't.  
  
". . . So then I went to see Natsumi . . ."  
  
'Natsumi,' Asuka reddened behind her ears. 'He still has Natsumi. He killed the boy I cared   
about, but he still has his precious little girl!'  
  
". . . We played checkers and . . ."  
  
"Shinji, I can't."  
  
"Nani?"  
  
"I can't do this. I can't . . . be with you. You hurt me so bad. You hurt me, and you will never   
know the pain of it all. You can't know what it is like to finally care for someone, finally break   
through and then have him ripped from you. You don't understand what it is to watch helplessly   
as you loose someone you care about, someone so frail and defenseless." Her voice was steadily   
raising to a high shriek. "I hate you! I have everyone!" She could feel warm tears building, but   
she didn't release them. Not now, not for him.  
  
Shinji stared at the girl. She was still so fragile, and he was still hurting her. The last thing he   
wanted to do was to cause her pain. "I . . . I understand." He swallowed and stood up. "I'll   
leave you alone. But Asuka, I care about you. If you ever need me, I'm here."  
  
She didn't say anything, couldn't for fear of the tears behind her eyes.  
  
Each step cut through Shinji like a knife as he walked towards her door. He felt he was   
neglecting his roommate, but it couldn't be helped. He could only hurt her by staying.  
  
Asuka hated herself for what she had just done. There was nothing else she could do. The pain   
was just too much.  
  
Misato looked up from the kitchen as Shinji walked out of the room. Seeing her, the boy went   
and sat down at the table. He really wanted to be alone at a time like this, but he knew it was no   
use. If Shinji went to his room Misato would follow. He may as well join her willingly and get   
it over with.  
  
The major was about to ask how it went. Seeing her charge's downcast look, she thought the   
better of it. Instead she looked at her watch and realized it was mid afternoon. She didn't doubt   
that Shinji had gone without food all day again. He had a lot on his mind these days.   
Wordlessly, Misato got up and did something she rarely ever did. She began to prepare a meal   
for her ward.  
  
Shinji watched her with slight amusement as she began to boil rice. "It's not your turn to prepare   
dinner."  
  
"Can't I do something nice for my charge every now and then."  
  
Shinji cocked an eyebrow. He knew she was doing this out of pity, but it felt okay, and he was   
very hungry. "Would you like help?" he asked, grabbing some instant soup to throw over the   
rice.  
  
"No instant stuff today, Shinji! Get the lamb!"  
  
"Lamb? You have lamb, Misato?"  
  
"Sure do." She winked. "Kagi took me to an Indian restaurant the other night. The lamb curry   
was so yummy, I decided to try some of my own. I made him buy me some lamb. It's in the   
fridge."  
  
Skeptically, Shinji opened the fridge. Sure enough, there was a rack of lamb right in the middle.   
He took it over to the sink to thaw. Then he got out the curry powder.  
  
"It's going to get better," Misato said, hunched over the thawing lamb.  
  
"I know," answered Shinji who was mixing curry. However he was very cynical about being   
forgiven any time soon. They had a better chance of making a fantastic Indian dish than he had   
of Asuka putting this incident behind her.  
  
However, the domestic task soon worked it's magic on the boy. What he loved most about   
housework was its consuming nature. It was difficult to think of anything else while cooking an   
intricate meal or cleaning a room until it sparkled. He smiled at his guardian. She always knew   
just what to do to help him forget his troubles, if only for a while.  
  
To Shinji's great surprise, in a couple of hours he and Misato were sitting down to a fabulous   
dinner of lamb curry and steamed vegetables. He smiled across at his guardian. "This is great."  
  
"I couldn't have done it without you." She winked.  
  
Shinji ate happily. The food was good. Misato was wonderful. Asuka was home. It wasn't   
perfect, or even close, but things were definitely beginning to look up.  
  
Then they heard a soft crying, coming from Asuka's room.  



	5. 

A/N: I don't own Evangelion. This is the last real chapter, but there is an epilogue after it.  
  
Lady Infinity: Thanks, don't worry, no suicide attempts in this fic :)  
  
Sumiki-chan: That was going to be the last chapter, but I wanted to follow up on some ideas   
from reviewers. I think you will like this ending better.  
  
Golden Child and Rhine: The last chapter was definitely a bridge, but the fact that two people   
picked up on it means I'll have to do some rewriting. Thanks for the insight.  
  
Everybody: Thank you so much for your encouragement. I hope you like the ending.   
  
******************************************************************************  
  
He Who Talks to Angels  
Chapter 5  
  
By Veronica Cereta  
  
*****************************************************************************  
  
The quiet sobs carried from Asuka's room to the kitchen.  
  
"I can't do this. Misato, please talk to her."   
  
The major looked across the table at Shinji. A comment about him running away leapt to her   
mind, but she refrained. "Okay." She resolutely left her lamb dinner and walked to Asuka's   
room.  
  
Shinji watched her walk slowly to the door and knock. After waiting a while, the major entered.   
'At least she doesn't hate Misato,' the boy thought, 'At least there is still someone for her.' He   
hurriedly ate his dinner and cleared off his plate. Then he wrapped Misato's dish and set it in the   
fridge.  
  
After cleaning the kitchen a bit, the third children escaped to his room. He planed to loose   
himself in the rhythms of his trusty SDAT. Shinji walked over to the table where he had left the   
device that morning, but it wasn't there.  
  
He looked to the floor and saw it, smashed to bits. Picking it up, the boy surveyed the damage.   
There was no way it could be repaired. He knew this had been the work of the second children.   
Who else would do such a spiteful thing to him. It didn't hurt so much that it was broken. What   
hurt was that Asuka had done it. He could easily buy a new SDAT. But this display of his   
roommate's rage was further verification of her hatred. He gently placed the useless machine on   
the table and lay on his bed, looking up at the ceiling.  
  
However, without his favorite escape, bad thoughts seemed to find him: thoughts of his last   
mission, thoughts of murder. Now that his roommate was home, he no longer had concerns   
about her health. She was still shaky; she still hated him, but now she had Misato and was going   
to be okay. Now he had time to concentrate on himself and he realized that he hated himself. It   
was a familiar feeling. Every time he ran away, or acted cowardly he experienced self-loathing,   
but it had never been as intense as this. A life was over because of him, a life that Asuka loved.   
Of coarse she hated him, he was evil.  
  
'No, I had to do it. Asuka would have died. Or is that just a cop out. Did I really try everything   
I could? Couldn't I have fought the angel, or tried to distract it? Couldn't I have done   
something, anything?'  
  
  
The thought kept returning, 'I took a human life.' Shinji sat up in bed and held his head with   
both hands. It was reeling with animosity against himself. He had to escape. He had to . . . run   
away. Shinji looked over at the table. Even if the SDAT had been working, it wouldn't have   
done much good. The pain of this experience was much greater than any he had ever felt. A   
couple of songs weren't going to ease it away.   
  
He stood up and walked to the door, while wiping away a few straying tears. He was worthless.   
He couldn't even save one little boy; one little boy who Asuka dearly loved. What good was he   
to anyone? He had escape. He had to find someone who loved him, who saw his worth. He ran   
from his room and out of the apartment. Tears swiftly trickled through lashes squeezed tightly   
together, as he hurried along the familiar route to the white, wooden group home.  
  
***************************************************************************  
  
Misato looked down at her charge. Asuka was sobbing onto her pillow. 'She's been doing that a   
lot lately,' thought the major, who wanted desperately to curb that trend. However she was at a   
loss as to what to do about it. This was an unusual and uncomfortable state for Misato.   
  
Asuka sat up and looked at her guardian through puffy, wet eyes. She knew that any minute now   
Misato would start a lecture about how she needed to find a way to forgive Shinji. 'I can't,'   
thought the girl. 'This time he has done too much. He hurt me. I hate him.' The red head was a   
little surprised that the major had not began to lecture yet.  
  
"I know what you are going to say," began Asuka finally. "You are going to say that I need to   
forgive Shinji. That it is best for the both of us."  
  
Misato looked at the girl. "I think you know that. Saying it again won't help at all."  
  
"It's too hard! I can't! I won't!" She was shrieking.  
  
The major was quiet and calm. "It will happen. You need Shinji, and he needs you. I can tell."  
  
Asuka was silent. From somewhere inside came startling realization that Misato was right.  
  
"Hey," the woman broke Asuka's train of thought, "How would you like some lamb curry?"  
  
***************************************************************************  
  
Shinji stood outside the house, relieved to finally be near someone who needed him. He rang the   
doorbell. It took quite a while for someone to come to the door. Finally a woman, who Shinji   
recognized as one of the respite workers answered. He was a bit surprised that Aibu had not   
greeted him.  
  
She extended a hand. "Hi, I'm Kathryn. Can I help you?"  
  
"Umm," he slowly replied. "I'm here to see Natsumi."  
  
"I'm reading her a bed time story."  
  
"Oh," Shinji's excited mood gave way to sorrow.  
  
Noticing the change in the boy, Kathryn smiled, "I guess it would be okay if you read it to her."  
  
Shinji looked up and grinned gratefully. "Domo Arigato."  
  
He and Kathryn climbed the dimly lit stairs to Natsumi's room. Shinji opened the door slowly.   
The lights were off except for a lamp by the bed. The little girl was in bed, waiting.  
  
Natsumi sat up and smiled when she saw him. "Hi, Shinji!"  
  
"Hello, Natsumi."  
  
Kathryn entered the room. "Natsumi, Shinji is going to read your bedtime story to you."  
  
"Yea!" the young girl squealed.   
  
Shinji smiled and sat down on the bed. He loved this place, loved Natsumi. He also needed her   
to give him strength and help him get through tough times. He needed her to help him find his   
worth.  
  
"Read this one!" Natsumi produced a book from under the covers.   
  
The boy looked at the front of the thin paperback. "Five Little Monkeys," he began. "Five little   
monkeys, sitting in a tree, tease Mr. Crocodile, 'Can't catch me.'  
  
Kathryn smiled at the pair and eased the door shut.   
  
Shinji watched her leave and then turned to the girl.  
  
Natsumi wasn't looking at the book; she was looking at Shinji. "What's wrong?" she asked.  
  
"Nani?"  
  
"You are sad. What's wrong?"  
  
Was he really that transparent? "Well, I did something very wrong, and I feel bad about it."  
  
"Oh. One time I hit Aibu very hard and he had a bruise and I felt sad for doing it."  
  
"Oh yeah." 'It's not quite the same thing,' thought Shinji, but he appreciated the effort.  
  
"Yeah," she continued. "Then I thought about all the people that love me and I knew I wasn't   
bad. Do people love you?"  
  
Shinji thought. He had been deprived of love for so long. He was sure his mother had loved   
him, but that was so long ago. Asuka might have loved him, but that was over. Misato, did she   
love him? She certainly cared about him, but was it love? He answered, "I don't know."  
  
"Well I love you!" The small girl threw her arms around the third children.  
  
He held her for a moment. "I love you too, Natsumi."   
  
*****************************************************************************  
  
Misato looked across the table at Asuka. The girl's eyes were puffy and red, but the tears had   
dried.   
  
"Arigato, Misato," the girl said quietly. "This is really good. And I haven't had meat in a   
while!"  
  
"Shinji helped."  
  
Asuka only nodded. Shinji sure was good at domestic tasks. Even though it seemed weak and   
feminine, it was a point in his favor; 'and god knows I don't excel at household responsibilities.'  
  
"Asuka," Misato spoke, "is there anything I can do to help you forgive and move on."  
  
With the delicious meal in her stomach, Asuka was calmer, more willing to reason. She thought   
logically for a moment. "No. Nobody can do anything. I want Shinji to know what he did, to   
feel with I felt. I know that's impossible, but it would be easier if he felt the pain of loosing   
someone he had grown attached to, someone he had reached after trying for a while." The   
second children was surprised how easy it was for her to discuss her feelings with Misato, but   
then the major had always been good at drawing out the best in others, and the red head was tired   
of being angry, yelling, and making a scene.  
  
"That eye for an eye stuff isn't healthy. You need to forgive, without hurting him."  
  
'It's a little late for that,' Asuka remembered the SDAT incident. She decided not to mention   
that to Misato. "I know, but it would just be easier if he understood."  
  
"Shinji's highly empathetic. I think you've picked up on that. I'm sure he understands without   
having to go through it."  
  
"Maybe so, but still . . ."   
  
"I know," said Misato. "Hey, I went drinking with Ritsuko the other night, and we saw the   
cutest guy. He was sitting at the end of the bar . . ."  
  
Asuka realized that the major was changing the subject, and she was grateful. The two eased   
gracefully into talk about boys and Kaji, but the subject of romance, brought to mind Shinji.  
  
***********************************************************************  
  
"Along comes Mr. Crocodile. SNAP!" When Shinji said 'Snap,' Natsumi raised a hand to give   
him a high five. She had done it since MR. Crocodile's first appearance; this was his third.  
  
"Oh, no! Where is he? Now there are only two little monkeys sitting in a tree, tease Mr.   
Crocodile, 'Can't catch me.' Along comes Mr. Crocodile. SNAP!" This time no little hand rose   
to meet his. He looked at the girl lying next to him.   
  
"Natsumi, are you sleeping?"  
  
"No. . . no. . . I just . . . I . . . I . . ."  
  
Shinji waited for the seizure to end, but it seemed to be taking longer than usual. It was different   
from the others. Instead of starring off into space, her eyes were closed tight. She began to   
convulse a bit.   
  
"Kathryn," the boy called.  
  
At this point Natsumi was convulsing violently. A string of drool had made its way to her   
pillow.   
  
"Kathryn!"  
  
Light streamed into the room as the respite worker threw open the door. She glanced at Natsumi.   
"Shinji, stand up. Now we have to turn her onto her side. It will help her breathe easier."  
  
The two wrestled the little girl to her side. Shinji held her there as Kathryn threw a blanket over   
her. When she saw the boy's quizzical look she explained, "She might loose control of her   
bodily functions. We don't want her to be embarrassed."  
  
Natsumi's comfort was the least of Shinji's concerns. He was afraid she might die. Then he   
remembered something from a movie. "Shouldn't we stop her from swallowing her tongue?"  
  
"No. There's more chance of us hurting her by restraining the movements in her mouth, than of   
her swallowing her tongue."  
  
"But there is a chance?"  
  
"A small one."  
  
This was unacceptable to the third children. He was used to being in charge. However, there   
was nothing to be done. "So she might die?"  
  
Kathryn looked at Shinji, "She probably won't."  
  
The respite worker picked up the phone by the bed and hit the speed dial. Shinji listened   
intently. "Dr. Walcot, yes, it's a grand mal . . . about three minutes now . . ."  
  
'Three minutes,' thought the boy, 'it seems like forever. Has it really only been three minutes?'  
  
"Yes Dr., she's lying in bed . . . on her side . . . breathing is regular . . ."  
  
Shinji watched helplessly as the girl went through the seizure. One word kept flashing through   
his mind. 'Probably . . . She *probably* won't die . . . She'll *probably* live.' He was useless.   
He, Shinji Ikari, who controlled the most powerful weapon in the world, was absolutely useless.   
There was nothing he could do to save this girl. Was this what Asuka had felt, what he had made   
her feel?  
  
"Dr. the convulsions are getting slower and less violent."  
  
Shinji was jerked from his thoughts. So intense were his emotions that he hadn't even noticed   
the little girl's movements slowing and becoming less ridged. Eventually, she stopped moving.  
  
"Natsumi!" Shinji tried not to yell. "Natsumi are you all right!"  
  
The girl's rigid body went peacefully limp. She slowly blinked her eyes open, looking up at the   
boy who was holding her by this time.  
  
"What's going on?" she asked quietly.  
  
"Natsumi! Natsumi!" Shinji hugged the girl tightly, grateful she was alive.  
  
"The seizure is over. Yes, Dr., she seems all right. I'll bring her by tomorrow for another check   
up." Kathryn put the phone back on the receiver and collapsed into a near by chair. "Thank   
God."  
  
Natsumi looked around the room. "Where am I?"  
  
"Poor dear," the respite worker explained, "she'll be a bit disorientated for a little while." She   
turned to the girl. "You're in you're bed. You just had a seizure. Your friend, Shinji, was   
reading you a bedtime story. I, Kathryn, am just going downstairs." She whispered to the boy,   
"I'll be there if you need me."  
  
Shinji nodded.  
  
Natsumi blinked after the woman as she got up and left the room.  
  
The third children gazed at the little girl in his arms. She was so fragile, just like Asuka. "Well .   
. . should we start the book over?" He was at a loss for anything else to say.  
  
Natsumi nodded and stared blankly at the pages as Shinji began the story. "Five little monkeys   
sitting in a tree. . ."  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
"I'm going to bed." A very sedated Asuka stood up from the table.  
  
Misato nodded and watched her leave. 'She's worn out. Harboring hate takes a lot out of a   
person.'   
  
Asuka was grateful for the sanctuary of her dark room. Talking with her guardian had been good   
and helpful, but it had also been exhausting. Despite her tragic past, the second children   
sometimes forgot how tiring intense emotion could be. She lay in bed and stared up at the   
ceiling. 'Why did you have to do it? Why can't it just be the way it was when we were together   
and Emi was alive?' She could feel the hatred rising again, but she was too tired to deal with it.   
She simply slipped into an agreeable sleep without another thought.  
  
******************************************************************************  
  
"Never tease a crocodile. It's not nice, and it's dangerous." Shinji finished up the story. "Good   
night Natsumi." He got up to leave.  
  
"Good night, Shinji." She still had that blank stare, like she didn't quite comprehend her   
surroundings, and really didn't care to try. Shinji didn't feel he could be around her much longer   
and was sadly grateful to leave her for the night.  
  
Downstairs he found Kathryn sitting at the kitchen table, reading. She looked up from her book   
as he entered the room.  
  
Shinji was glad to see her. "Um, Kathryn . . . Natsumi doesn't quite seem herself."  
  
"Yeah, once she sleeps through the night, she'll be fine. She just needs to shake it off. Trust me,   
tomorrow she won't remember anything about the seizure. The only way she'll know it even   
happened is that she'll have an extra doctor appointment."  
  
"Oh," the boy hoped she was right. "Well, bye."  
  
"Hey," Kathryn stood up. "Are you going to be there tomorrow?"  
  
Shinji thought. "Yeah, I really want to go. I just feel kind of out of place, since it was my fault."  
  
"How could it be your fault that Emi was hit by a car? You don't look old enough to drive."  
  
The third children had been so wrapped up in his problems that he hadn't noticed the cover up.   
It wasn't just a story they told Natsumi. It had to be the official scenario. He was slightly   
amazed at the efficiency of his father's organization. He also wanted to scream that it was he   
who had done it. People had the right to hear the truth. On the other hand, this way nobody   
hated him. A few moments passed before he realized that Kathryn was still expecting an answer.   
He decided to keep the cover.  
  
"Um . . . I was here when he ran out into the street."  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry. But you must know it's not your fault."  
  
"Yeah, I guess. Anyway, I'll see you tomorrow." Shinji practically bolted from the house. He   
felt bad for lying, but since everybody else was . . . 'Well, my father would want me to keep up   
the cover.' He was copping out again and he knew it, but maybe this time it was for the better.  
  
***************************************************************************  
  
Asuka rolled over. She had slept for a while, but after the exhaustion had worn off, she realized   
that she wasn't very tired at all. She looked at the left wall of her room, then at the right. Then   
she lay on her back and looked up at the ceiling. 'I wish something would happen.'  
  
At that moment she heard the apartment door open. Saying a quick prayer of thanks to the gods   
of distraction, she listened intently. Distinctly, she heard the door to Shinji's room slide open   
and the third children enter.  
  
'What is he doing up so late?' In her head she invented a few explanations. He was running   
tests, he was out having fun, he was . . . well, nothing seemed quite right. Her curiosity was   
overpowering her hate. 'I can talk to him for a little bit, just to see what he was up to,' she   
rationalized.  
  
The second children didn't even bother to knock on the door. Opening it she called, "Shinji-  
baka, what are you doing up so late?"  
  
Shinji sat up in bed. He was very surprised to hear his roommate's voice. He stuttered, "I went .   
. . to see Natsumi."  
  
The red head rolled her eyes, "What were you doing there so long?"  
  
"She had a seizure. It was . . . scary. I thought she might die."  
  
Asuka was taken a back. She silently chastised herself for wishing her pain onto Shinji earlier   
that evening. If anything happened to Natsumi, Shinji would be dejected. "Is . . . Is she okay?"  
  
"Hai. She's alright."  
  
"Good." With genuine gratefulness, Asuka turned to go to her room.   
  
Shinji watched her go. "Arigato, Asuka," he said quietly, then smiled and fell into an easy sleep.  
  
***************************************************************************  
  
The next day, Shinji woke early. It was Saturday, the day of Emi's funeral. He donned a nice   
pair of black slacks and a black tie. When he emerged into the hall he was surprised to find   
Misato and Asuka already waiting for him. He looked at his roommate. She was beautiful. Her   
little black dress hugged her body. Her hair was put up and red ringlets framed her face.   
  
Asuka noticed the boy's gaze and smiled. Then, remembering that she hated him, she looked   
away quickly. Shinji didn't mind so much, things were getting better, just as Misato had said   
they would.  
  
The three walked silently to Misato's car and drove to the cemetery. Shinji wasn't sure what   
religion Emi had been, or if he even had one. The ceremony was going to be a simple,   
nondenominational service. They would stand around the casket, loved ones would talk, and   
everybody would say good bye to the little boy.   
  
Shinji couldn't quite tell if the silence in the car was in reverence to the dead or because of lack   
of anything to say. It was the first time the three of them had been together since the incident.   
Maybe they were all nervous. At any rate, Shinji would not be the one to break a silence.   
  
Asuka stared ahead. She wanted to say something, to let Shinji know that she didn't really hate   
him, that she finally understood, and knew that he understood as well. But her pride wouldn't   
allow her to speak, so she observed the silence.  
  
Misato was concentrating on the road. She wanted to say something to make the two children   
make up, but she also wanted to avoid a scene this morning. It seemed her charges were on their   
way to reconciliation and she didn't want to ruin that. She kept her mouth shut.  
  
So in perfect silence they arrived at the cemetery. It was a small plot of land just outside Tokyo   
Three. They walked through the rows of grave markers towards a place where a crowd had   
gathered. They couldn't see the casket yet, for all the people, but a bright red Japanese maple   
shaded the plot. There was a little creek running by the tree. It was the perfect place for a little   
boy to rest.  
  
As they approached, Shinji noticed a blue haired girl in the crowd. After clearing it with Misato,   
and more importantly Asuka, he went over to talk to the first children.   
  
Rei looked up as Shinji neared. She was happy to see the boy and this surprised her a little.   
  
"Hello, Shinji."  
  
"Hi, Rei. What are you doing here?"  
  
Rei paused for a moment while she wrestled with her feelings. "I . . . I . . .just thought I would   
be here . . . for . . . you . . .you know, if you needed me, or something."  
  
Shinji was shocked and very amused. He had never seen the girl at a loss for words, and never   
so full of emotion. "Arigato," he smiled. "You're a great friend."  
  
Rei was taken a back. 'Friend.' In one word Shinji had given a title to the feelings that she   
could not decipher. Friend. It was a warm word, a secure word. Rei liked it; she liked being a   
friend to Shinji. She smiled, "Arigato, Shinji."  
  
"Well, I'm going to get back to Asuka. I just wanted to say hi."  
  
Rei understood. The feelings she had of wanting to help Shinji were the same ones he harbored   
for Asuka. She nodded in agreement as Shinji slowly walked away.  
  
'Friend,' she mused, turning to face the casket.  
  
***********************************************************************  
  
Shortly after Shinji had left Misato had found her high school friend, Kathryn. Asuka, slightly   
bored, began scanning the crowd. It was full of Emi's teachers, relatives and classmates. It was   
the classmates who caught the second children's eye. One boy in particular, he was a skinny   
little thing with thick black hair. By his self-stemmed behaviors, flapping his arms, staring into   
space, it was evident that he had a disorder very similar to Emi's. The red head approached him.  
  
"Hello."  
  
He completely ignored her, focusing on his hands instead.  
  
"Are you autistic?" She tried to look into his eyes. "What is it like in that world of yours?"  
  
He looked at her for a brief moment and then went back to his hand.  
  
She smiled, "I bet I could break into you're world. I've done it before, you know."  
  
Asuka was suddenly overcome with an intense desire to get to know this boy, to help him break   
free. Then she noticed the others, a little girl using sign language with an older woman, a boy   
sitting in a wheelchair staring blankly ahead. She wanted to help them all. This desire was   
completely new to Asuka. Until this point all the second children had ever wanted to do was   
pilot her Eva to earn the praise of others. Now, looking around, she had a drive to . . . study   
special education. Maybe someday the angels would stop coming. Maybe she wouldn't always   
be able to pilot. That thought had been unthinkable at one point, but now she had something   
tangible to hang onto. She had hope that there may be life after Eva.   
  
She looked at the children and thought of how great it would be to help them, to make a   
difference; a boy using the white cane when he walked, a girl using a book with pictures to   
communicate, a girl with a helmet running to . . . Shinji?  
  
Asuka looked closer. It was Natsumi. The red head smiled happily as the little girl and boy   
embraced. 'He'll make a good father some day,' she thought for a second time.  
  
***********************************************************************  
  
Shinji had seen Natsumi coming from a ways a way. Despite his good clothes and the crowd   
gathered, he ran to meet her. The little girl jumped into his arms.   
  
"Hi, Shinji!"  
  
"Hi, Natsumi. How are you?"  
  
"Just great! Look what Kathryn bought me, because I have to go to the doctor today." She   
proudly held up a small model dinosaur. "It's a dienonychus. It was smart and strong and only   
as big as a man, but eleven feet long . . ."  
  
Shinji grinned broadly. Natsumi was back to her normal self. She was going to be just fine.   
With that realization, his thoughts turned once again to Asuka. He waited patiently for the girl to   
finish talking. "That's great, Natsumi, but now I have to go see a friend."  
  
"I'll come with you."  
  
Shinji looked around, wondering if it was okay. Then he noticed Natsumi's respite worker   
talking to Misato. "Sure, come on." He took her hand and led her to his guardian and   
roommate.   
  
The third children walked over and stood next to the second. He still held Natsumi's hand   
tightly. Looking over at his roommate, Shinji noticed her smile, and the new life behind her   
eyes. This made him bolder.  
  
He whispered, "I know it doesn't mean much, but . . . I'm here for you."  
  
Asuka turned to look into his eyes. He was so sincere, so . . . loving. And she was so tired of   
hating him. She was still mad, and would be for a long time. But now she had something else to   
cling to. Now she had hope.  
  
"Actually, Shinji, it means a lot," she whispered, taking his hand.  
  
He had watched her come through so much. Often she seemed fragile, but she was truly strong,   
truly wonderful. Holding on to Natsumi with one hand and her with the other, he felt like he   
could do anything, say anything, and he did. "Asuka . . . I love you."  
  
The red head's eyes welled up with tears. As the celebrant began his talk she could only reply,   
"I know." Someday when the pain had numbed and the memories faded, she would be able to   
say those three words back. She knew it, Shinji knew it, and for the moment, that was enough.  



	6. Epilogue

A/N: I don't own Evangelion.  
  
Thanks for all the great reviews. I have a lot to work on with this fic. Here's your happy ending,   
as promised :)  
  
*****************************************************************************  
  
He Who Talks to Angels  
Epilogue  
  
By Veronica Cereta  
  
***************************************************************************  
  
A married couple stood over a boy's grave twenty-two years after his death. Their oldest son,   
Emi, was now fourteen the same age the couple had been when they had encountered the boy for   
the first time. Their other children, little Misato and Kaworu knew enough to quit fighting and   
keep still on this somber occasion. Three children were a lot for a Japanese family to have, but   
this couple had seen a lot of death. They loved bringing life into the world after watching so   
many depart from it.  
  
This was their yearly ritual. The red headed woman, as always, placed a white rose on the grave.   
White, to remind them of the boy's life, how he had taught them patience, the value of beauty,   
and how to love. The woman was a special education teacher, and one of the best in the field.   
She specialized in severe/profound cases, especially autism. People across the country sent their   
children to her school, hoping she would help them break free, and she usually did.  
  
The dark haired man set a red rose beside the white one. Red, to remind them of the boy's   
sacrifice, that he had died to save the woman, and the rest of humanity. The man was a   
psychologist. His private practice kept the couple wealthy enough to afford the finest things for   
their family. On weekends he volunteered his time at a maximum-security prison, consoling   
inmates who were convicted of murder. People often wondered how he could muster so much   
compassion and empathy towards criminals, but his wife never wondered. She had seen him   
forced to kill twice. See knew that he had felt first hand the pain his patients were feeling.   
  
The family stood in silence for a few moments; then the man turned to his wife. "Maybe she   
isn't coming."  
  
"Give her a little time. She's always come." The woman knew how much the man needed to   
see her. The annual conversations he had with this woman gave him strength and courage to   
face the coming year.  
  
The man nodded and waited. Before long a beautiful woman nine years younger than the couple,   
came strolling up to the grave. She had short brown hair and a childlike smile. Thanks to new   
medications and the supportive husband walking beside her, she didn't wear a helmet any more.   
The woman was a world famous paleontologist. At first she had only done research and written   
books, but the requests for her to make speeches had been unceasing. Eventually she decided to   
give it a try and was very glad when she did. As long as her husband came a long to help her off   
the stage in the event of a grand mal seizure, she was okay. She had petit mals on stage from   
time to time, but the audience always waited them out very patiently.   
  
The woman's husband, a very handsome grade school teacher, was always at her side. Though   
his job was demanding, he was never too busy to escort her to a museum dinner, or   
paleontological conference. In his arms he carried their son, born just that year.  
  
The two families stood side by side, thinking for a while about the little boy in the grave. Then   
the brown haired woman turned to the other family.  
  
"Hello, Shinji, Asuka!"  
  
"Hi, Natsumi!" They replied.  
  
"Is this the little one I have been reading about in your letters?" Shinji smiled.  
  
"Yes," said Natsumi, "this is Inochi. Would you like to hold him?"  
  
As Shinji gently took the baby, Asuka thought about what a wonderful father he was. Natsumi   
and Shinji went off and talked about the past year and the one approaching. Asuka smiled after   
them. They were so lucky to have each other. Shinji's wife and Natsumi's husband shared   
stories and tricks of the trade while they waited for the two friends to finish.   
  
Emi looked at his namesake's grave. He had heard many stories about this boy from his mother   
and father. He knew that the child was mainly responsible for his mother's career, and partially   
responsible for his father's. He also knew that without this child his parents might have never   
found the love they shared for one another. He was very proud of this boy and his name.   
Someone small bumping into him jarred Emi from his thoughts. He looked down at his little   
sister. "I'm gonna get you, Misato," he threatened harmlessly. He chased Misato and Kaworu   
for a little while, tickling them when they were captured. Asuka was going to put a stop to this,   
but seeing that they were the only people in the cemetery, she laughed and let it continue.  
  
Half an hour passed in joyful conversation before Natsumi had to leave for a conference. She   
said goodbye to the couple and made Shinji promise to write more. Shinji and Asuka said   
farewell to Natsumi and her husband agreeing to meet again next year.  
  
The Ikaris were alone in the cemetery. Shinji took his wife's hand and said the words he always   
said before they left, "Asuka, I love you."  
  
Blissfully, she repeated the words that she couldn't say the first time, but said easily now, "I love   
you, too, Shinji."  
  
  



End file.
